


Somebody's Fool

by saiyuri_dahlia



Category: Pocket Monsters: Gold & Silver & Crystal | Pokemon Gold Silver Crystal Versions
Genre: Adorkable Irwin, F/M, Irwin Not A Stalker Just Head Over Heels, Post-Crystal, Short Chapters, Sweetness Ahoy, mostly gameverse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-19
Updated: 2014-04-17
Packaged: 2017-11-29 19:57:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 32,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/690847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saiyuri_dahlia/pseuds/saiyuri_dahlia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was a comet and he was her light trail. He was the joker who always feared she was the one humoring him. Like her yes to letting him travel with her. After all, why would a Champion want some silly juggler anyway...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For this fic, Irwin is about 15 and his appearance follows the HG/SS models—it seems to be the more prevalent image of him and the one I most aesthetically like. Also, Kris's team is from my own Crystal game and since it's not that big a deal, I see no great reason to change things. In general, this fic mostly follows the Crystal gameverse, with some minor changes here and there.
> 
> To everyone who reads this fic and gives it a shot, thank you. Thanks for reading.

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon or any of its related media.

-o-

Chapter One: The Journey To Your Heart Begins With The First Step

-o-

She said yes.

Irwin hadn't mistaken her. He swore he hadn't. Her sweet voice had clearly said yes. He couldn't believe it. _She said yes,_ he repeated to himself, completely stunned, and stood motionless like an Xatu. Under his still exterior bubbled so many happy emotions—he felt like one of his Voltorb ready to self-destruct. He shook with happiness. After all, he had expected a kind letdown at his highest hopes, but this…this _yes_ …this was wonderful!

Elated, Irwin jumped up into the air and shouted his joy for all of Johto to hear.

Mid-air, the juggler realized that cool guys did not leap up and shout hurray but, well, Irwin wasn't known as a cool guy. People didn't call him cool—they called him an idiot, a dork, a goof, a loser but never cool. And when it came to his feelings, Irwin could never be so calm. He lacked the capability to put on that kind of nonchalance cool guys had that girls fell for.

And how could he be calm? After all, Kris was the girl he thought about every day, the girl he hoped at every sunrise would visit him again on Route 35. She was the girl who, unbeknownst to her, had won his Heart Badge the day she defeated him. And, well, now knowing he could be beside her on her travels, how could Irwin _not_ jump for joy?

He had fallen for her, not at first sight, but quickly after. At about two minutes into their quick battle, Irwin had decidedly pinpointed. And if the axiom about how trainers fought reflected aspects about themselves, then most unequivocally Kris was beauty, Kris was passion, Kris was—

Laughing at him.

The juggler blushed and sunk into his stage costume. "I'm—no…um… It was stupid of me…er…sorry…" Irwin said, flustered, as he ran a quivering hand through his tall blond hair.

Thank goodness there wasn't a mirror in front of him that could show him exactly how stupid he looked right now. Irwin was certain the only image that could top that was of him seconds earlier gawking at Kris in total silence while he, temporarily forgetting she was _actually_ in front of him, slipped into his usual adoring reverie of her.

 _She must think I'm a complete idiot_ , Irwin thought, wishing he could cover his hands over his face and curl up into a very, very small ball.

"Sorry about what?" Kris asked.

Either he hadn't looked like a moron or she wasn't paying any attention to him—Irwin preferred a third option: that she was being nice—Irwin was glad Kris didn't seem to know what he was talking about. And, well, with the way she tipped her head to the side like a confused puppy, she was just too cute.

"Nothing, I guess. False alarm," Irwin said, smiling uneasily at first before breaking helplessly into an awkward laugh.

To Irwin's surprise, Kris rejoined her laughter with his. Except her laugh wasn't out of nervousness and fear of looking like a fool like his. Her laugh was confident and bright. Her laugh was a girly giggle, sweet and bubbly, like strawberry soda pop. Irwin was positive he could stand forever drinking in the sound.

He loved her laugh, though sometimes she laughed when he wasn't trying to be funny and it hurt but still he delighted in her cheer. Giving her a little bit of happiness was well worth over his trivial heartache any time, he had long decided.

Eventually, their laughter died out and Kris said, "I have to go into Goldenrod, is that okay with you?"

"I'll go wherever you go, Miss Kris," Irwin said, smiling as he slipped on his backpack over one shoulder and then the other. "You're the leader."

"Okay, let's go then," she nodded, her twin dark blue pigtails bobbing in accordance. "And, please, just Kris, 'kay?"

"Yes, Kris." Irwin grinned like a fool and happily took his first step as her traveling companion.

Abandoning his spot turned out to be easier than expected. Irwin didn't think he looked back once, but of course, what hold did a patch of dirt and a length of white fencing have on him in comparison to trekking the world with his heart's desire? Seemed like a no-brainer choice, like choosing between evaporated Moomoo milk and the real stuff. There were two things in the world Irwin knew to be resolutely true: One, that he was a boy who liked only real Moomoo milk. And two…

That he loved Kris and would do anything for her and go anywhere she said. He would obey her wishes, all of them, to make her happy. _Whatever you want, I'll fight to make it so,_ he thought, gazing at Kris walking ahead of him. _That is the truth, my dear._

Starting this journey with her reminded him of all nights he dreamed of her in distant places—sitting outside of a café at night in a faraway city, walking along a beach awash in fading golden twilight, climbing a trail on a high, rocky mountain guided only by the full moon's light. In his every vision of her, she would in time turn and gaze partly up at the glittering stars and partly toward a face Irwin knew was not his but wished wholeheartedly it was.

But those were dreams he never needed to have again now that he was her traveling partner. And as happy as a hungry Snorlax at an all-you-can-eat buffet as Irwin was, he still feared with every step that Kris would suddenly turn and tell him it was all a joke and to politely go away. But so far, she hadn't, and if it truly was all a cruel prank, she would have told him so before they reached the surrounding city limits of Goldenrod City.

-o-

Sure, Kris had been surprised when Irwin asked if he could travel with her, but once she thought about it, it wasn't really a shocking request out of him at all.

She was used to him calling her frequently, or occasionally her calling him, and talking about her adventures and mini-accomplishments or just anything. Irwin was always excited for her successes and was ready and willing to talk about and hear everything—sometimes their conversations lasted for hours if Kris got too caught up divulging the details. After listening to all her relayed tales, Irwin just wanted to share in the adventure and that's why he had asked to join her, Kris figured.

And well, if he was inspired by all her reports and wanted to journey with someone, Kris saw no reason to say no. After all, Irwin was a nice guy, a little odd but only because he was always clowning around. He was likable and their friendship had grown since their short battle. They weren't close but they were friends.

 _This'll be fun, traveling with somebody_ , Kris thought as she and Irwin approached the steadily expanding sight of the Goldenrod Radio Tower.

Stopping a few steps short of the tower entrance, Kris turned to Irwin and said, "I just have a little interview to do, but after that's done, we're free."

Irwin blinked. "Interview?"

"Yea, Mary's been hounding me everyday. I think Prof. Oak gave her my number…" Kris, at the thought, gave a small, annoyed frown but brushed Mary quickly out of mind. "Anyway, I've been Champion for nine months now, so I think I better give one eventually, right?"

Irwin nodded in agreement.

 _Yep. I should give that interview,_ Kris told herself.

Kris did not move.

_I really should._

Kris was a statue. An unmoving, except for a faint trembling in the legs statue staring at the radio tower. _But it could wait, right? If I_ had _to, that is. I mean, what's a few more months? And Irwin and I should really get on with our adventures anyway…_

Kris glanced to her side at Irwin. Though Kris really couldn't tell what he was thinking, Irwin seemed perfectly content with rocking back and forth on his heels and whistling a happy tune while he patiently waited for her to go in. A Pidgey flock soared above in the clear azure sky and Kris grew warm in the sun and yet did not budge.

"I can do this some other time," Kris said and quickly spun around and marched away.

"Huh?" Irwin looked confused. "But you're the Champion?"

Kris stopped. _Yea, I am. But I don't really act like one. I'm not acting like one right now._

"I'll let you in on a little secret…" Kris said. As she brushed her fringe out of her eyes, she noticed Irwin's face visibly brighten. _He's probably just being funny so I'll relax,_ Kris considered. _It's nice of him. He's always trying to make me laugh._

"I really don't want to do this. It scares me," she said quietly, as if her words would be picked up and broadcasted over the radio if she spoke above a whisper. "I've never been interviewed before. I'll freeze up. I'll make a fool of myself. I know I will."

"You won't. You'll do great," Irwin said.

"Yea, sure…" Kris groaned in disbelief. "I'm not a professional celebrity. I'm just…me."

"But Kris, you're really amazing. You can do anything! You've done so much and you became Champion. It'll all go fine. …And, well, for whatever reason if you do flop, never fear!" Irwin stuck his thumb out, pointed toward his chest, and struck a heroic pose. "Your sidekick Irwin will get you out of the city safe and undetected!"

Kris flashed a small smile. "Thanks. That sort of helps. …I think."

"It's a promise," Irwin said, punctuating his words with a firm nod.

Kris did feel better. She didn't feel confident about the interview, but she did feel a little better. Sure, Irwin meant well, but he wasn't the one under the spotlight here—though he would probably love the attention.

Irwin didn't have an entire region—two regions, actually, since Johto and Kanto shared the same Champion—listening in and expecting him to be cool and fascinating and have the air of power a Champion should have and to not sound and act like an eleven-year-old girl. Kris liked and wanted to be the Champion—she had no qualms about that. Kris just worried about the rest of the world finding out she was the Champion.

After all, Lance had been their Champion for so long, and the part seemed so well suited to him. No one would believe Kris had defeated him. She certainly did not live up to the expectations Lance set in the people's eyes of what constituted a Champion.

 _So I guess it doesn't matter if I mess up_ , Kris realized. _No one's going to believe I'm the Champion anyway…_

Kris tipped her head down and sighed at the ground. "Well, let's get this over with." She headed toward the radio tower.

"Umm, Kris?"

She paused and circled around to meet the juggler. Irwin had his head bowed as he twiddled his thumbs over and over.

"Do you…" he asked shyly, peering a quick glance up at her before fixing his dark eyes back on the sidewalk. "Do you think I'll be allowed in the room when you do your interview? I'd like to be there to hear it, if you think the station will let me."

Kris blinked twice. "I don't see why not. As long as you're quiet, I suppose they would."

Irwin grinned his largest beaming grin yet. And Kris barely managed to quell the laugh bubbling up from her chest and hurried toward the station.

 _He's such a big goof, and over the littlest things,_ she thought as she entered the radio station through Irwin's held-open door.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes: Thanks to a guest for leaving kudos. Just happened to see it right before I added chapter two. Thank you. To any and all who do, thanks for reading.

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. Since I'm writing fanfiction, who would've thought?

-o-

Chapter Two: Boy Meets Girl Meets One Nosy Radio Host

-o-

To Irwin's delight, he was allowed to sit in the room while Kris did her interview. The station ordered that he remained quiet once the show was on but he did the crew one better—Irwin was silent from the moment he entered the radio tower. He sat on Kris's side, perpendicular to her seat, which the guest seat was, of course, straight across from the radio host.

Like just about all of Johto, Irwin had heard DJ Mary's voice over the radio countless times but had never met her before. She was a pretty young woman—though not as pretty to him as Kris—in a dark green turtleneck sweater and a short black skirt. Her red hair flipped up at the ends and large glasses rested over her brown eyes. And for some reason, Irwin thought she'd look thinner…

The show was starting soon. Mary quickly talked to a guy on her crew about timeslots if the interview ran over. Or something along those lines. Really, Irwin wasn't listening intently to the busy people around him. Irwin much preferred occupying the waiting period by gazing at Kris.

Under the above soft white lights illuminating the mostly dark studio room, Kris glowed. Irwin only wished she wasn't so nervous. Stare fixed down on the tabletop, Kris rapidly combed her hands through one of her pigtails over and over. With a little more effort, Irwin feared she'd pull her hair out. He hung his head and sighed. If he only knew the perfect words to wipe away her anxiety…

Kris swiveled her chair and met Irwin's gaze. He could see in her dark blue eyes alone she was worried, fearful even, and wanted, no, needed some sort of bolster from him. Irwin gave her the best that he could—he gave her a big grin and two thumbs up.

Irwin barely got to see her crack a small, fragile smile before 'On Air' was signed and Kris turned her chair around to meet Mary.

"Hello everybody!" Mary exuberantly called into her microphone. "We have a very special guest today on the show! I, DJ Mary, have the honor of hosting the very first interview with the new League Champion. Yes, you heard me right! The NEW Champion! Interview start!"

Kris sat waiting in silence. Mary made a fast motion indicating to Kris to introduce herself. Jumping in her seat, Kris leaned toward her microphone and said, "Umm, hello. …My name is Kris, and I'm from New Bark Town."

"Oh! Same town as the famed Professor Elm, right?"

Kris nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

"Please, please, call me Mary. No need to be so formal," she said, fanning a hand in an encouraging manner.

Kris took deep breaths and tried getting a hold on her nerves. Her cheeks were flushed pink from her minor mistake, but otherwise she looked a fraction less ill at ease now than she did earlier waiting for the show to start. Irwin kept sending her encouraging thoughts and good feelings and crossed his fingers and wished for the interview to go well.

"Okay, so I know we have many questions for our new Champion and eager listeners waiting, so why don't we get started? First question! Ready?"

Kris nodded and steeled herself.

"Did you ever imagine when you first started as a trainer at ten that you'd end up the Champion and so rapidly?"

Kris closed her eyes, took one last deep breath, and composed her answer. "I never set out to be a trainer. But when I became one, I suppose becoming the Champion was something I thought about as a hazy goal but it wasn't at the forefront. I was more worried about surviving day to day, battle to battle than about becoming the Champion."

"So wait… " Mary said, her eyes wide, "if it wasn't your intention, how did you become a trainer then?"

"Prof. Elm had me run an errand for him and gave me a Cyndaquil on loan to fight off wild Pokemon and I bonded with the little guy. When I got back, Prof. Elm said I could keep him and I went from there."

"You were a bit of a late bloomer then?"

"I suppose you could say that," Kris said.

Now a few questions in, Irwin saw Kris ease bit by bit. Kris leaned back more into her chair and her smile started to grow. The majority of her fear had been, like Irwin suspected, all in her head, and once the interview started and she realized the kinds of questions she would be asked, Kris relaxed and answered each question honest and sincere. Irwin had told her she would do fine and she was. Kris just had to understand that for herself.

_You can do anything_ , Irwin thought as he listened to Kris's next answer, a summary of her adventures as a trainer he had memorized chronologically, forwards and backwards, _as long as you never forget that you can._

"And a year and a half later here you are the Champion! That's quite a list of accomplishments for an eleven-year-old."

"Well, the journey wasn't without its struggles. I trained nonstop, day and night. I rested when I could, but between trainer after trainer and wild Pokemon appearing all the time, I slept little."

"Well, you're still a cute girl," Mary said.

"Thank you." Kris gave a short, polite bow. "A benefit of youth, I guess."

Irwin blinked. That was news to him. For all his time spent on the phone with her, he had never once asked if she was tired or resting well, even after she reported such tales like the time she explored the Ruins of Alph or stopped Team Rocket. On the phone, she had never sounded sleepy, even if it was past midnight, and when he saw her, she had never seemed fatigued. But hearing how she slept little, guilt sunk heavily in his chest at the thought of her staying up late talking to him when she could have been getting some much-deserved rest.

"So as word spreads of your Championship, do you believe rest will come easier or be harder to come by?"

"Well, I hope to get to relax more, but I do think there'll be an influx of trainers vying to battle me. I knew if I became Champion I would have to take the good with the bad. What happens, happens. Things will stay interesting, I know that."

_Not if I have any say_ , Irwin leaned back in his seat and smirked. _I don't care who comes challenging you—if you're too tired, no one battles you. They can be patient and_ you _matter more. If you need rest, I'll see to it that you get it, my dear. I promise._

"Speaking of before you were the Champion, how did you feel starting your campaign versus the Elite Four and finally Lance? You were nervous, right?"

"Yes, but more so for the safety of my team. I knew they were strong, but of course, I worried if they were ready. Other than that, I was pretty confident. I knew I would do well, maybe not become Champion, but I knew I would prove where I stood as a trainer."

Mary laughed. "For all that confidence, you sure underestimated yourself."

"In retrospect, it seems that I did, but I had no way of knowing how things would turn out at the time."

"Of course," Mary nodded. "And your impressions of the Elite Four?"

"They're all super strong, awesome trainers. I am honored to have been given the opportunity to battle them," Kris said.

"And Lance?"

"He's a really cool guy. Of course, he's also a powerful trainer. And the way he battles is remarkable… Watching him is awe-inspiring. His dragons are so well trained. The Elite Four tested my limits, but facing Lance was a test, not of my team's preparation, but of my worthiness as a trainer. I liked facing him most of all."

_Eh?_ Irwin quirked an eyebrow. _Okay… Wasn't expecting to hear that._

"So would you say that you _admire_ Lance?" Mary, smiling brightly, keenly asked.

"Umm, I…" Kris stared upward and considered.

Irwin barely sat still in his seat and sweated in wait for Kris's response. Whether he'd hear her clearly enough over his pounding heart, he wasn't sure.

"…Yea, I guess I do admire Lance."

A cold wind blew past Irwin and cut him in half. _She_ admires _him?_

"And that's a lovely necklace you're wearing. Looks one of a kind," Mary said, keeping her bright smile.

Kris reached and touched the clear crystal pendant dangling from a long, thin white ribbon. When she hadn't been running her fingers through her hair, Irwin had watched her pull the necklace out of hiding and hold the pendant to help calm her nerves. "Thank you. It is."

Mary narrowed her stare suggestively. "Did Lance give you that necklace?"

"No!" Kris sharply denied and quickly slipped it back underneath her shirt.

"Ohoho, then who? It looks like it's pretty special to you." Mary doggedly pursued the subject, much to Kris and Irwin's evident discomfort.

"It is..." Kris paused and stared down at the tabletop, taking a moment to touch the pendant as she thought. "…But I don't think I'm supposed to tell."

"Ah…Young love," Mary said dreamily. "Made all the sweeter by being so tragically forced into secrecy—"

Kris bolted out of her seat. "It was NOT Lance!" she shouted. "Kindly move the conversation or I _will_ leave!"

Mary looked back at Kris in wide-eyed shock. Kris, her face flushed red, stood waiting for Mary to make up her decision. Having never seen Kris angry, Irwin was impressed. He was the only one in the studio room who could smile—he wasn't on the receiving end of Kris's fire, after all. And also because the necklace wasn't from Lance.

_That does not mean she does not like him, you twit_ , Irwin's conscious, having his mother's lofty voice, reminded him and crushed his glee.

"Oh, please, forgive me," Mary pleaded, giggling nervously. "But you can't blame a gal for giving her listeners what they'd want to hear."

"And the details of an eleven-year-old girl's love life counts as important news?" Kris said wryly as she returned to her chair.

Mary nodded. "To my listeners, yes. …But you're no ordinary eleven-year-old girl, you're the new Champion."

"Yes, now may we please talk about that now instead?" Kris said, annoyance creeping into her cool tone.

And they did for the rest of the interview, which lasted only a few more minutes now that Mary wasn't attempting to get too intrusive and personal with her questions. The interview came to an end and Mary's crew threw the show to music.

Mary stood and shook Kris's hand. "Thanks for coming. I'm so happy I finally got you on the show. I'd love to have you back, even for a small segment. You could co-host a show with Prof. Oak and me if you wanted."

"Thanks, maybe I will. But I'm kind of busy, y'know, but if I found the time, I would," Kris said politely. "Thanks for having me. I enjoyed the interview. It was fun."

A crew member informed Mary that they were about to go back on air in a few seconds. Mary sat back down at her desk and said once more that Kris could come back anytime as she waved goodbye. Kris returned the wave and nodded to Irwin and they quickly left the studio room, both because Mary's show was going back on air any second and because Kris hurried to get out of the radio station.

-o-

"Can you _believe_ that woman?!" Kris groaned loudly as she and Irwin walked through Goldenrod's busy, open city market. "People are going to think there's something between Lance and me now. I wish I never did that stupid interview!"

Irwin agreed and listened and nodded along as Kris outraged against Mary's very, very wrong implication. He didn't mind being her sounding board—after all, she wasn't angry with him, and all her rage proved to him that Kris wasn't in love with Lance. That alone brought a smile to Irwin's face. That and the fact he found Kris, all red-faced and tossing her arms furiously about as she vented her frustration, to be very cute. All in all, it was a win-win for Irwin.

Kris breathed a long irritated sigh. "If Lance heard the show, I'll die. He'll never want to be seen anywhere near me, not after Mary's rumors spread. He'll be humiliated—"

_He'll be humiliated?_ Irwin froze in his step. "You're only worried about _him_? What about you? Mary embarrassed you too. Doesn't that bother you?"

"Not really…" Kris said, blinking at him. Her temper had faded and she appeared more puzzled than anything else. "You think that it should bother me more?"

"Yes!" Irwin shouted. _Of course, you shouldn't worry about him! You were more humiliated than he was! He was barely involved in this._

"Oh…" Kris peered down and held her chin and thought.

"This isn't something to reconsider, Kris!" _How does his embarrassment outweigh her own? With him not there even?_

"But I don't feel that way. I don't, Irwin. I can deal with my embarrassment but Lance's bothers me. Probably because he wasn't there to defend himself. I wish I could talk to him…"

Hearing that, Irwin's eyebrows shot up and he raced to stand in front of her.

"Don't concern yourself, Kris," he said, putting on a twitchy smile, and vigorously waved his hands at chest-height. "He's a celebrity. He's used to it. To him, it's a weekly thing. Odds-on it happens every Tuesday. You know how many tabloids and entertainment shows pair him up with people all the time? It probably doesn't even faze him. No need to worry."

"You think so?" Kris asked, her eyes wide and bright.

Irwin readily nodded yes.

"Okay." She smiled. "Thanks, Irwin."

At that, Irwin softly laughed through his grin as his cheeks turned pink.

"Let's get going, 'kay? I don't know about you but I'm ready to get out of Goldenrod."

Irwin could not have agreed with her more.

"Excuse me, miss!" an old man called from his nearby berry stand and seemed to be waving at Kris to come over. "Yes, you, young miss next to the silly-looking waiter with the superhero fetish!"

"HEY!" Irwin shouted, visibly affronted.

"That man was just trying to get our attention, Irwin. He meant no harm," Kris said. "Let's see what he wants."

_Well, I'm not buying anything from him_ , Irwin grumbled as he followed Kris across the busy market street to the old man's stand. _He called me a waiter._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which the chapter title is being honest. And thanks to a guest for leaving kudos. To everyone and all, thanks for reading.

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. If I did, Kris would've been in HGSS. Nothing against Lyra but they already had a Johto girl character.

-o-

Chapter Three: A Series of Unfortunate and Convenient Hindrances

-o-

Of course, it only took a few steps to reach the old man's berry stand, even if it was just a foldaway table with a mounted parasol and some straw baskets filled with berries. Irwin frowned as they walked over but Kris thought the old man looked kind enough and she wanted to hear what he had to say. Irwin was probably just sore from the man innocently referring to him as a waiter. It wasn't as if the old man could have called him by name and maybe he hadn't met many jugglers to know that Irwin was one.

"Yes, sir?" Kris said. She hoped the old man did not just lure her over to give her a sales pitch. It wouldn't be her first, although better the goods were just berries rather than Slowpoke tails.

"I hear you right, young miss?" the old man said in a small, reedy voice. "Are you planning to leave Goldenrod? And, if I may guess, by way of Route 35?"

Kris nodded. "Yes, sir. That's exactly right."

"Can't go that way," the old man said.

"Huh?" Kris blinked. "But I just came from that way. Nothing was wrong."

"Come on, Kris," Irwin said as he laid a hand on her shoulder and tried guiding her away from the stand. "The old guy's obviously bent in the head or at least blind."

"I'm not talking about right now," the old man said, annoyed. "I meant later on. Young people, think they know it all, too impatient to listen—"

Kris ignored Irwin's tugs to her sleeve and grumbling that they leave the stand. If there was something wrong or going to be wrong with Route 35, she wanted to know. "Please, sir, what do you mean?"

"Radio says there's a storm coming," the old man explained, nodding sagely. "Popped out of nowhere and coming down from Ecruteak. Already flooded and took out power to the city. It's circling the outskirts right now but it's predicted to wash out Route 35 and every road before it before it hits Goldenrod. Roads aren't safe to travel tonight. Period."

"Really?" Kris said and the old man nodded in affirmation. "Then thank you, sir, for telling me."

"Heh," the old man closed his eyes and smiled coyly. "Overheard you saying, and I couldn't let a cute miss like you go headfirst into a storm. Now, you can repay an old man's kindness by purchasing a basket of the finest—"

Kris believed the old man about the storm but the rest was clearly him trying to make a sale. While he still had his eyes closed and poured out his modest push, she left and by the time he realized she was gone, she and Irwin were already down the next street.

Chewing on her bottom lip in uncertainty, Kris worried and wondered what they were going to do next. _If this storm didn't sound so bad, I'd fly with Pidgeot_ , she considered.

"So what do we do now?" Irwin asked, his thoughts matching hers. "Do we go toward Azalea Town?"

"No. I have to go through Route 35," Kris said. "I guess our only option is to stay the night, let the storm pass."

Seemed as good as any other idea and with their luck, their wandering had brought them close to the Pokemon Center.

As the center's automatic doors opened, they were greeted to the frantic sound of rolling gurney wheels, shrill Chansey calls, and Nurse Joy commanding the fleet of Chansey and nurses-that-were-not-Nurse-Joys alike. There was a rush of people and Chansey running, little kids crying, and mass disorientating chaos precariously held in line by only Nurse Joy. Never once in all her travels had Kris ever seen the Goldenrod Pokemon Center this busy.

Her tired eyes catching the sight of Kris and Irwin mid-turn, Nurse Joy tossed an obligatory smile and greeting before the urgency of her surroundings forced her to be more direct.

"Please state the nature of your Pokemon's injuries," Nurse Joy said. "I am sorry but if they do not require immediate response, please be considerate and wait patiently until your Pokemon can be attended to."

"Actually, our Pokemon are fine." Kris hated having to explain that. Nurse Joy was already very stressed and probably didn't need nor want someone bothering her that didn't absolutely need her. Kris felt like such a distraction. "We just need a room for the night, if you can spare one."

"I'm sorry, but due to the annual youth tournament being held, I am afraid we don't have any boarding," Nurse Joy said and then shouted at a Chansey to sing to sleep a confused Charmeleon breathing fire around the packed waiting room.

"That's okay—" Kris said before Irwin pulled her down and out of the way of the still-very-much-awake Charmeleon's flamethrower flaring over their heads. "Uh, it looks like you've got your hands full anyway. Sorry for bothering you," Kris said quickly, her voice shaking.

Since Nurse Joy definitely had bigger things to worry about and fireballs were whizzing past their heads, Kris and Irwin hurried out of the Pokemon Center. _And to think I wanted to be a Pokemon nurse growing up,_ Kris thought, heart thumping in her ears, as she caught her breath.

After being inside the Pokemon Center, the regular hustle and bustle of Goldenrod City seemed calm in comparison. It was certainly more inviting and didn't put either one of them in the immediate path of instant third-degree burns. As they walked aimlessly down the business district, Kris stared up at the sky. Gray clouds hazed over most of the gray-blue sky. It was a very blah kind of sky. The clouds weren't quite storm clouds but they didn't bode well.

Irwin sighed and wondered aloud where would they stay the night.

"Don't worry, Irwin. It's no trouble," Kris said, holding out her purse in hand. "I'll get us a room. Hey!—"

The young thief (and Kris's purse) raced up the street, plowing between passersby and tourists alike. For some reason, no one stopped the kid, about seven by Kris's estimations, even though he had quite blatantly and brazenly stole her purse right out of her hand in front of every living soul around them.

"Unhand that purse, you little scoundrel," Irwin shouted and dashed off after him, Kris seconds behind him.

The boy's smaller size allowed him to slip past people quicker than either Irwin or Kris could, giving the kid a sizable lead. Their chase was neither long nor very impressive. Following the kid down the alleyway he had ducked in, they found the boy climbing over the top of a chain fence. Pulling down the bottom of his eye and sticking his tongue at them, the boy hopped down from the fence and ran through the rest of the alley and out onto the opposite street.

"Don't worry, Kris. He's a tricky brat but I'll get him!" Irwin said as he hopped onto the fence and tried to climb after him. Tried being the keyword. As he struggled, lost his foothold, and fell, Kris realized maybe this wasn't the most effective approach. She had to give him an 'A' for effort though.

That and the sight of her dark purple purse on the ground completely changed her prospects.

"Uh, Irwin… Here's my purse," Kris said. By feel alone, she knew it was empty. "He took it all."

Irwin stifled a gasp of pain as he landed once again on his tailbone—to his credit, he had almost made it over the top this time. As he slowly rose to his feet, he remained hunched forward and braced a hand against his lower back like an old man.

"Sorry, Kris," Irwin said, wincing through some aches. "Bet we could still catch him though."

Kris shook her head and smiled at him. "No need. I have my purse back."

Irwin blinked in confusion as to how that was a good thing but Kris just kept on smiling as she put away her purse.

"He took my money, not my bankcard," she explained. "Joke's on him. I wasn't carrying enough to buy a Pokeball with."

"Well, that's good," Irwin said. "So…to the bank?"

Kris nodded and they headed on their way.

"How's your back?" she asked. She had seen him fall on his tailbone so many times she figured it had to be hurting.

"Ah, don't worry about me. I'm fine," Irwin assured. "Only hurt when I landed on it but I'm a-okay now." He tossed her a grin and a thumb's up.

"Are you sure?" Kris asked, concerned and not entirely convinced. "You did fall a lot."

"Don't trouble yourself, sweet girl! For I am a young man who regularly drinks his milk. My bones are so strong, I am part Steel-type!" As if to prove his point, he flexed his arms and made a series of bodybuilder poses.

Kris tried to cover her hand over her giggles but they bubbled out of her without delay. She couldn't help herself. Irwin was just so goofy. _He's feeling better,_ she thought. _That last hit looked like it had really hurt but he seems all right. I'm glad._

It had been so long since the last time Kris had ever visited the bank, she had forgotten where it was. Luckily, Irwin knew the streets of Goldenrod backwards and forwards, having performed on just about all of them. With his help, they had found the bank much quicker than if Kris had wandered around trying to remember.

The building was so large and prominent she would have had to be blind not to eventually find it anyway. Kris liked how the bank's grand front entrance was located at an angle at the corner where two streets met. She hadn't been there many times before but even she knew from the quiet outside that the bank was unusually not busy. Quite peculiar since Goldenrod was such a bustling city.

_It's not a holiday, is it?_ She wondered and peered up to the sky as she made her way up the concrete steps. _Nope, none I can think of._

Its barks identifying it way before it ran around a street corner and into view, a Growlithe raced up the steps and put itself between Kris and Irwin and the front doors of the bank.

"Stop!" Officer Jenny ordered, appearing from the same street corner as the Growlithe. "You cannot go inside!"

"Why can't we go in?" Kris asked.

"It's too dangerous for one thing," Officer Jenny said, standing by her Growlithe, now quiet and patiently awaiting orders. "Put your arms down, boy," she said to Irwin, who had raised his arms up and put them behind his head at first sight of her. "We have evacuated the block and no one without official clearance is allowed to enter. Please leave the area. It's for your own safety, kids."

"Nothing to fear, ma'am. Kris is the Champion," Irwin said in a brave voice. "There is nothing dangerous to her. And if anything proves too mighty, I, her faithful sidekick, shall see her to safety. Now, pardon us if you will."

Irwin tried to march past her, only for a not amused Officer Jenny to put her arm out and halt him. Her Growlithe hunched down, bared its teeth, and made a low warning growl.

"Can't do that, buddy," Officer Jenny said in a voice that promised she would sic her Growlithe on him in a heartbeat if he did not comply. Irwin promptly stood back beside Kris. "No one is going inside. Not with group of wild Magneton going berserk."

"Kris could take care of it," Irwin readily said.

"I'm sure she could," Officer Jenny said, smiling at Kris, "but we've got professionals on it."

"But Kris is the best!" Irwin said, only to receive an I'm-still-not-going-to-let-you-pass glare from Officer Jenny.

"Please, Officer, is there any way you could quickly let us make a transaction?" Kris asked, eyes and voice full of appeal. "All our money was stolen and we need a place to stay the night."

After all, it would only take a minute, mostly likely not even that, to withdraw money from her account. It was a very simple request and they very much had the need. If only Officer Jenny would just bend the rules just a teensy-weensy bit….

But Officer Jenny would not.

"Sorry to hear that but even if I did let you in, the systems and power are down. The Magneton fried everything. The bank will be closed for some time."

Kris stared down at the concrete steps. _I wasn't too worried earlier but now I don't know what we'll do. We don't have any place to go. With no money, where will we stay? Hotels don't accept promissory notes._

… _Maybe Nurse Joy will let us stay in the waiting room if we ask really, really nicely._

Officer Jenny's Growlithe padded up to her, stood on its hind legs, and placed its front paws on her legs. It made a sad little whine and nuzzled its face against her in consolation. It was the first time Kris had ever seen an on-duty Growlithe act very much like its puppy self. Kris put on a soft smile and petted its head as it wagged its tail vigorously.

For a fire Pokemon, its fur was soft. Kris had fought plenty of Growlithe before but she had never caught one for herself. That was going to change. She could see herself walking the giant backyard of her distant future home with a Growlithe by her side.

Momentarily surprised by her Growlithe's behavior, Officer Jenny soon ordered it to stand back at attention. Growlithe obeyed but from its facial expression and the stillness of its tail, it looked like it wanted Kris to keep petting it. Officer Jenny then focused back on them. "Again, sorry about your predicament but you must leave. This is my final order."

Kris apologized for their intrusion and made a short polite bow before she and Irwin in tow headed down the stairs.

"Y'know there's a seven-year-old pickpocket running around," Irwin said, wryly and annoyed, over his shoulder. "Might want to get someone on that..."

Kris pulled him away by the sleeve before Officer Jenny ordered her Growlithe to perform a take down.

On the next street and far away from the law, Kris kept her sight toward the ground as she contemplated their nonexistent options. So far, if Nurse Joy didn't permit them the waiting room, they would have to hope someone either took a promissory note or let them work for them in exchange for a place to sleep. Even if they had to work all night, it was still a better deal than being out in the storm. Kris just hoped their luck would have it and they would find someone kind enough to negotiate with them.

Then again, if they had to rely on the luck she was having today, Kris hated to see what awful thing would happen to her next. First, DJ Mary's rumors, the crazy, filled-up Pokemon Center, her purse was stolen and the bank systems were down and they had no place to stay out of a violent storm coming. This was by far the worst and most-out-of-place visit to Goldenrod City she had ever had.

_If I didn't have official Champion business to take care of, I would have gone toward Azalea Town like Irwin suggested,_ she sighed.

At the thought of Irwin, it at last dawned on her that he had been talking the entire time. Her ears felt warm and an awful knot twisted in her stomach as she realized she had not been paying much attention. Luckily, he hadn't noticed and it was very easy for her to swiftly figure out what he was venting about.

"Really, way she was acting it was like _we_ were the criminals. The people here are rude and it's only gotten worse. It's why I stayed out on Route 35," Irwin said, still quite annoyed. "I know you could've taken that bunch of Magne—wait, what would you call a group of Magneton anyway? A link? A unit? A network?"

He paused for a moment to consider the answer, his irritation softening to curiosity as he pondered the idea. In the end, he waved his hand dismissively. "Ah, doesn't matter. What I can't believe is how she didn't immediately want your help when I said you were the Champion. You figure they'd _want_ the greatest Pokemon trainer in the land to help them with a _Pokemon_ problem. These people are rude and crazy."

"Well, it's not like it's well known I'm the Champion. Aside from Mary's interview, it hasn't exactly been broadcast across Johto and it's not like I'm some celebrity." _I'm not Lance_. "People just don't know yet."

_Yea, people just don't know Lance isn't the Champion anymore. But everyone thinks he is. It'll come to a shock to learn he isn't, that they have to see me as their new Champion. …Like that'll happen._

_I know that if Lance had shown up Officer Jenny would have wanted his help, would have eagerly awaited for him to agree, would have practically given the reins of command over to him. There would have been no need for their 'professionals'. Lance would have taken care of everything in a matter of minutes. Because he is their Champion._

_And I am just a girl. A Champion in name but not in spirit._

"Don't worry, Kris," Irwin said, laying a hand on her shoulder comfortingly and grinning. "They'll all know soon. If I have to shout it off Mount Sliver, everyone will know."

She gave Irwin a smile as thanks but truthfully, deep down, she didn't know if she wanted everyone to know she was the Champion. The world would be looking to her, would be expected to rally behind her, and how could she ever garner the hearts and respect of the people of Johto and Kanto like Lance had? Who else but Lance could ever be their Champion?

She may have defeated him in battle but how could Kris ever surpass him as Champion? Could anyone?

For all the impossible things she had done throughout her adventures, for the first time, Kris had no confidence she could ever succeed where no one else had ever thought plausible.


	4. Chapter 4

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon. Irwin would have made a few more calls or been given the option to join the player on their journey.

-o-

Chapter Four: Irwin the Provider

-o-

"You could battle a few trainers. I'm sure it would take you no time to win," Irwin suggested as they sat on a bench in Goldenrod's small city park. Irwin hadn't been so convinced by the old man's info—the geezer had looked pretty crooked to him—but after watching the sky go from bright and blue to a very miserable gray rather quickly, he had to reconsider.

Kris sat cross-legged beside him. She stared pensively out at nothing particular, her mind no doubt fixated as much as his on coming up with an answer to their definitely-going-to-be-stuck-out-in-the storm problem. So far, battling trainers had been his best yet. Her, not him, since their objective was to earn money, not lose it, and well, Irwin didn't exactly have any money to lose.

She shook her head no. "It wouldn't be fair. I'm the Champion and there are only little kids around. I'd feel like a bully."

_Ah, so just and considerate…_ Irwin thought in admiration as an ache panged in his chest at seeing her so consumed with worry. He wondered if she would think it weird of him if he hugged her and told her he'd make sure everything would be all right. He thought against it, at least for right now.

He could see her point though. With the annual youth tournament going on, there were many young trainers running about the park, meeting one another, showing off their Pokemon. Even though it would be like fishing Magikarp for her to raise enough cash by wins, it wouldn't be right.

"Hmm… Then there's no other choice," he said, as he rose from his seat. Quickly dropping to one knee in front of her, he laid one hand on his heart, the other he outstretched to her palm facing up, and said gallantly, "Fear not, fair maiden, for I, Irwin the Juggler, will earn enough and shield you from the storm. I promise on my honor as your sidekick, I will not fail you!"

Kris blinked at him as he smiled at her. She looked like she didn't quite know what to make of his grand gesture, words and all. She seemed…confused, which definitely wasn't the kind of reaction Irwin was going for. He knew he didn't have a chance to get the reaction he actually wanted and fantasized—her practically leaping into the safety of his arms to hug him and tell him how she knew he would make everything all right—but he hoped to at least earn a smile. Unfortunately he didn't even receive that from her.

"Okay, but how are you going to do that?" she asked, curious to know.

"Follow me and I shall show you!" Irwin said, making a broad swoop of his arm in a large come-with-me gesture as she hopped up from the bench and trailed after him.

Technically, it was not illegal to perform on the streets but cops cracked down on street performers during quiet times, falsely accusing them of disorderly conduct or resisting arrest, but occasionally turned a blind eye if the performer was good enough.

Since he was a minor, Irwin mostly received warnings, stern lectures, and fines in lieu of jail time when he was caught. Still his face was pretty well known down at the station. He was friendly with most of the officers—one always took him out for ramen (and lectured him through dinner)—but a few treated him like dirt. No matter since he always got back at them whenever they were mean to him.

Since the police recognized him too well, he mostly performed out on Route 35 now. It had been a while, two months shy of a year in fact, since he had been out on his old street but nothing had changed, except the Meowth that slept in the bakery's storefront was now a Persian and it looked like it ate a cake a day, but the street itself looked the same.

And to his surprise, no one had moved in his spot. Which was strange since it was a pretty good location and the street was fairly well traveled. Normally, there was a tight claim on spots, petty feuds fought over choice locations, and when a good spot came open it was usually snatched up pretty quickly. Luckily, Irwin had never needed to go through such drama.

"Okay!" Irwin was full of energy, not sure if it was out of anticipation or nervousness, as he handed Kris a hat and directed her to her spot. "Kris, you're my bottler. All you have to do is go through the crowd and take collections and if you can, encourage people to watch. Never ever forget to smile. It's very important to smile. The rest is all up to me. I promise I won't let you down."

"Irwin, are you sure this will work?" Kris asked, quite unsure.

"Well, it kind of has to, doesn't it?" Irwin said. "But nothing to gain and nothing to lose in trying!"

Kris gave an uncertain but agreeing nod in return.

"All right, big smiles!" he said, double pointing to his own big grin as she mirrored him. Her smile was more nervous than he hoped for but he was certain she would cheer up once her initial flutters stopped.

As soon as he turned around with a big sweeping arm gesture, the show was on.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, gather around, quickly gather around!" Irwin called, waving his hands encouragingly. "Today is a lucky day for I, Irwin the Juggler, have a show that will astound and amaze you! Feast your eyes on my graceful ball dexterity!"

He struck a dramatic pose intended to convey mystery and wonder as he held up three different types of Pokeballs between his fingers.

"Please, please, hold your ovation…" Irwin said, flapping his hands in a please-settle-down gesture, despite the complete silence of the meager crowd. "But if you must, give all your applause to the maiden, my lovely assistant, Kris!"

And the audience erupted into a fit of cheers and whistling. One fellow even gave a catcall.

"Umm, hi…" Kris said, waving and smiling uneasily.

"Please, from now on until after the show, please offer a collection," Irwin said. "You can do so simply by giving what you can to Miss Kris."

Holding up the jester's hat, her voice and manner pleading, Kris said, "Please do. We have no money for a place to stay out of the storm."

"Er…yea," Irwin said, trying not to let his astonishment show itself on his face.

Well, generally, a street performer in need didn't broadcast their dire situation to their audience as a matter of personal dignity and not wanting to be called out for pulling a pity card by their audience—after all, the heart of their act was the show itself, not the financial gain. Even when he had been half-dead from starvation, Irwin had never let his audience know. He was a performer, not a beggar.

He probably should have told Kris not to be so blatantly honest about why they were out here. But then again, her innocence and sincerity might work for them. Their audience might not see it as a pity ploy but as a genuine request for help. Irwin hoped so, because they really did need the help.

Irwin started the show, warming up with a few basic skills before showing off some of his tricks. He was determined to make this his best show yet, not just because of the necessity for his success but also to impress Kris and show her his juggling wasn't just a hobby but an honest profession to him. This was the first time she would actually see his act and he was not going to have a bad show in front of her.

He had more skill than just spinning in place as he tossed, his circles growing faster and tighter with every revolution, and kicking back his supposedly dropped balls. As he juggled one-handed, Irwin quickly pulled out a red handkerchief and then tossed each Pokeball onto his covered hand. Tying up the cloth and then throwing it for a single circle, Irwin unknotted the handkerchief to reveal the three Pokeballs had turned into a Lure Ball, Heavy Ball, and Love Ball. The mildly impressed crowd politely applauded.

Blinding his eyes with the folded up handkerchief, Irwin proceed on with juggling. To his knowledge, there were only a few Jugglers around that were confident enough in their technique to try juggling blindfolded. Though muscle memory had a lot to do with it, Irwin had pinpointed his timing and kept a strict count off in his head. He could even do his spins and kick backs blindfolded.

As was the nature of such shows, people came and people went, leaving when their attentions swayed or their schedules demanded it. Long as they left entertained and didn't sneer at him, Irwin was happy. Of course he was happiest if they paid but there was always that small percentage that watched but did not compensate him for his effort. A bit frustrating, yes, but it was just something one had to deal with as a street performer.

The trick ball he had added popped open with a burst of confetti and glitter, revealing the Igglybuff plush hidden inside. Though he thought about tossing it to Kris, a little girl, no older than five, with short red pigtails in pink overalls stood out in front.

He recognized her entrancement. It was the same bright-eyed wonder he had expressed years ago at his first experience with seeing the circus. He felt lucky if he could draw that kind of awe in a child's face—contributions were always welcome but bringing a smile to a kid's face was often his real reward of performing.

"Catch it," he said and tossed the plush to the little girl.

Surprised, she scrambled forward and grabbed it just before it hit the sidewalk. She was hesitant to keep it at first until he told her it was hers. The little girl smiled, gave thanks, and stepped back into the crowd, hugging her present.

Irwin felt like everything was going well. Of course, Kris knew better if the show was drawing any profit but from the steady stream of spectators and Kris doing her best and keeping up her smile, their prospects could not be that hopeless. Sure their luck today could not be described by any terms of good but how could they not succeed here? They had an entertaining show and a cute bottler girl and could anyone really look at Kris and give nothing for the show? Only if they didn't have a pulse.

"Hey, look at this," Irwin overhead a young man say and raised his head high in pride of his skill and love of providing unexpected entertainment to passersby.

"I didn't even know dorks still did this," the other boy said. "Thought they all went on to computers or band camp."

"This one didn't get the memo," the first boy sneered. "Along with the one that any idiot can toss and catch balls. So lame."

"Only reason he's tossing Pokeballs is 'cause he can't catch anything with them! …Oh look, the loser dropped one!"

Sure there was usually one heckler or two in every Juggler's crowd and normally Irwin ignored them pretty well. But he hadn't performed in the city in a while and with Kris there, he had accidentally let the jerks distract him a little and yea, he had lost track of one of his props—not as if he hadn't had an otherwise flawless show. Well acquainted with guys like these (partly because they were boys his age), it would not have mattered if he had the best show in the world, they still would have ridiculed him.

Irwin paused to pick up his dropped Pokeball and saw Kris, well, her sneakers and legs jostling her way through their remaining audience.

"If you're just going to be mean, why don't you leave!" she said, face pinched tight and glare sharp. The guys looked on wide-eyed and yet still smirked in amusement at her sudden flash fire reprimand.

"Kris, Kris, it's all right…" Irwin said, fanning his hands in another please-calm gesture as he stepped over. "So my usual tricks not enough for you gentlemen? Well, I have one more special technique that might be of interest."

"Doubt it…" the second boy, the one with his sunglasses perched on the bill of his cap, snorted derisively.

Irwin turned to the audience and announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, I will now at great personal risk juggle four live Voltorb! This is a dangerous act, one that very well will endanger my life, so kiddies, please don't try this! Ever! Not at home, school, friend's house, the mall, nowhere!"

"This ought to be good. I'd pay to see the idiot blow himself up," the first boy, the more handsome one of the two, said and his friend agreed as they and many others in the crowd gave money for the act.

"Irwin, no…" Kris said, concern ringing clear in voice.

_Not to fret, my dear,_ Irwin thought as he released his team, _for the threat of danger is more in their minds than is actually present. These are, after all, my Voltorb and I am a very good juggler. It will all turn out for the good in the end, I promise._

"Okay, we'll start with three," he said, tossing the pair in each hand and the one waiting on his foot, building up his rhythm and getting a sense of his timing.

Despite the whole being a living time bomb that could explode at a moment's notice at the creature's whim or at reaching its anger peak, Voltorb were not that different from any other prop he had ever juggled. Sure, Pokeballs were less temperamental but not as thrilling to a crowd. Even if the jerks had not shown up, Irwin had been planning on juggling his Voltorb for his finale or outright if his opening act had not drawn a crowd.

When ready, he ordered his fourth Voltorb to roll onto his foot. "Okay, now four!" With only a little flub in his timing, he caught the last one and his pace evened back out.

Although normally his Voltorb were quite agreeable and willing to perform, each one had their moments of unexplained, unpredictable sudden irritation at the world, which usually made for no Voltorb-juggling that day, a just prevention in case the foul one decided to explode on him. As far as it seemed from their expressions and obedience, his Voltorb were up for being tossed but of course, their minds could change. Of course, Irwin had a pretty good estimation on how long and how far his team's patience went.

"Looks like more of the same…" the guy with the shades groaned after it became obvious there would be no immediate explosion.

"He your boyfriend?" the pretty boy asked Kris.

"Just friends," she said. "We started traveling together today."

"Like a traveling circus?" the shades guy said, smirking.

"No," Kris said, shooting a look at the other boy that left no doubt that she thought his comment was very rude.

"Why are you out here then?" the pretty boy asked. "You're supposed to be hitting the streets but not like this, right?"

"There's a storm coming in and we have to stay the night."

"So you need a place to crash?"

Irwin didn't like the way he was grinning at her.

"For tonight," Kris said.

The pretty boy flipped his long, shoulder-length dark green hair away from his face and put on the charm. "Well, you're welcome to stay the night with me. I'm having a party and there's gonna be a lot of cool people there. Come with us. We'll have fun together tonight, I promise."

"Really?" Kris said, her voice and expression brightening. "Let me tell Irwin—"

"Sorry, honey," the pretty boy snorted as he grabbed her arm. "He can go have fun with himself. We just wanna hang out with you."

"Then I'm not coming," Kris said, jerking her arm out of his hold. "I won't go where Irwin isn't allowed."

"You've got really weird priorities, chick," the shades guy said, as he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him. "If you wanna be popular, ditch the loser and come with us."

"Your argument stinks!" Kris shouted and shoved the shades guy away. "Get your hands off me!"

For the most part, Irwin's attention was placed where it was supposed to be with his Voltorb but he had overheard most of their conversation and as the hecklers became more aggressive toward Kris, contrasting with their polite tones and their appeals that Kris calm down, and no one else in the dwindling crowd seemed to be alarmed by what was unfolding, his attention wavered.

"We'll have fun, I swear," the pretty boy said, still with that all-too-charming and rather-slimly smile of his.

"I'd rather sleep out in the storm," Kris said, stepping away from him only to hit the smirking boy with shades' chest.

"Come on, doll face, you don't mean that—"

Unable to stomach their behavior toward Kris not a moment longer, Irwin looked at them and shouted, "Hey! Get away from her!" And then he felt a Voltorb slip off his fingertips. "Oh sh—"

The bright flash of the detonating Voltorb momentarily blinded his sight but soon everything in his vision seemed to be whooshing past him as the blast threw him back and against the building behind him, the back of his head making sharp, sudden contact against the brick.

On the concrete sidewalk, he was disorientated and the explosion left a ringing in his ears but despite that, he still managed to pick up the muffled sound of Kris shouting his name as the blurry world faded to black.


	5. Chapter 5

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon.

-o-

Chapter Five: The Hospitable Hotel Hunt In Which Beggars Can Be Choosers

-o-

Kris sat at Irwin's bedside alternating between watching him rest and closing her eyes and praying. She pressed her crystal pendant between her interlaced hands as she hoped he would be all right. All she could see was him after the explosion laying crumpled on the cracked sidewalk, not responding either to his name or when she gently shook his shoulder. Kris had been certain he was dead until one of their spectators told her he still had a pulse.

After waiting and waiting in the waiting room, which Kris had decided should really be called the worrying room because that had been what she and everyone else had done as she waited for a doctor to finally grace her with their presence and tell her how Irwin was doing.

At last, a doctor had appeared and assured her he was all right with very little actual reassurance in her voice. The doctor's tone had been clinical as she explained Irwin had regained consciousness by the time the ambulance had arrived, that he had completed all her tests and answered her questions, and that all his cognitive functions were working normally. She had also said he was very lucky boy, but from the way she had said 'lucky', it seemed like she could have easily substituted 'stupid' in its place.

When they had entered Irwin's room and Kris had seen him laying in bed, Kris had asked if he was in a coma. The doctor had said he was not, much as he looked like it, and had explained the accident had left him shaken and that he just needed some rest. And then the doctor had left Kris to wait for Irwin to wake up. That had been a little over an hour and a half ago.

Once again, head bowed, eyes closed, and hands in prayer, Kris hoped he would show her he was okay, instead of just accepting someone telling her he was okay. Anything would have been good—him opening his eyes, giving a smile, even him making another one of his goofy faces would have been great. She just wanted to know for herself and didn't want to simply go by the apathetic doctor's analysis that he was going to be all right.

"Kris?" she heard faintly.

She looked up to find his dark eyes at last open again and gazing into hers. "You're awake!" she said, smiling in relief. "I'm so glad."

"I think I'm a little happier that I'm okay than you are," he said, grinning. "…Sorry, for worrying you."

"No apology," Kris said, shaking her head. "I'm just grateful you're all right."

"How did we do?" Irwin asked, much to Kris's confusion. "How much did we make?"

"People gave a lot more when they thought you were dead. Even those mean boys…" And then she peered down toward the floor, her small smile fading into sadness. "But I had to use most of it for your medical expenses, and, well, that didn't leave much." She opened her purse and showed him what little was left.

Irwin frowned in disappointment. "Tch. That's not nearly enough. I've got to get back out there and earn more." He sat up and started unwinding his bandages around his head.

"Lay back down," Kris ordered, standing up from her seat and laying her hands on his shoulders. "You need to rest! We can stay here until you're better."

"And the doctors? What did they say?" Irwin asked.

"That you're fine, but they want to monitor you."

"Doctors always say that," Irwin said as he hopped out of bed. "I'm fine. Look! I can walk, talk, do handstands…" and then he demonstrated only to manage a second of stability before crashing into the room door. "…Well, I never could do handstands, but I bet I can still juggle."

And then he proved he very much could still perform all his tricks with great flair and efficiency. "See?! I'm okay!"

Well, he did seem to be all right but Kris still didn't see the point of rushing off. "But you might have a concussion. We can stay here…"

"Pfft. That's not a real thing. Doctors use that as a excuse to get you to stay for billing," Irwin said dismissively. "No, Kris. I told you I'd find us a place to ride the storm and I'm going to. A hospital's no place to stay. It's a _hospital_. The only people that sleep in hospitals are sick, drug-induced, or dying and we are neither. Speaking of which, there are _dead people_ in the morgue and I will not have you and me sleep under the same roof as _dead people_. I promised you that I would find a proper place and I shall."

Kris stared down at the floor, uncertain of how to convince Irwin that the hospital was just as good as anywhere else to spend the night and that it was for his own good that they did so. She was also uncertain whether he was truly all right like the doctor had determined and that Irwin was just being Irwin or whether his hit to the head had done something after all.

He was being too stubborn. Irwin didn't have to push himself so hard. He didn't have to earn a room for them. What was so wrong about staying in the hospital? It was a roof over their heads from the storm. Sure, he had a point about the morgue but no one ever brought up the morgue first thing when talking about hospitals. Well, no one except Irwin.

"Did you happen to find the hospital morgue when you were little?" Kris asked, curious.

"Yes, but that's beside the point," Irwin said in a deadpan voice as he crouched down so their faces were level with one another's and whispered reassuringly, "Don't worry, I'm all right. Let's go. Please, Kris…"

He wasn't going to listen to her. No matter what she said. He had made his decision and he was going to follow through with keeping his promises. No matter how stubborn and foolish she thought his decision was, Kris reluctantly nodded.

As she followed him out of the room, she made a quick look back and hoped they wouldn't wind up returning right here again before the night was over. Kris didn't think she could handle watching him nearly kill himself again and over something as relatively minor as finding a shelter for the night.

-o-

Much as Kris didn't seem to believe him and looked over at him with concern in her eyes every so often, Irwin really felt all right. He had pretty much stopped hurting the moment he had opened his eyes and saw her smiling at him—so bright and happy and relieved to see him awake. It was the best medicine for him.

In the small city park, Irwin stood by the central water fountain and readied himself to put on show number two.

"Ladies and gentlemen—" he called to the small crowd that had already gathered around him and then saw out of the corner of his eye a police officer making a beeline their way.

"Hey! You!" the officer called.

"Uh oh." Irwin grabbed the jester's hat out of Kris's hands and said quickly, "If anyone would like to make a donation, please do so now!"

No one did.

"Irwin, what's wrong?" Kris asked, worried.

"It's the street performer's natural enemy…the police!" Irwin said, stuffing the empty hat into his waistcoat. "Run, Kris, run!" And when she did not head off, he grabbed her by the wrist and ran with her, partially dragging her every once in a while.

Though the old coot had gained thirty pounds and grown a silly handlebar moustache, Irwin knew the officer barreling after them all too well. They had a history, mostly of the officer treating him like scum and Irwin pulling pranks on him in retaliation.

From the first time they had met, the officer had treated him like he was a delinquent and not worth his time. All he had done was obstruct foot traffic a little with his show, not mugged an old lady by knifepoint like the old coot had decided Irwin had done. Since he had been thirteen at the time, the officer had demanded to talk to his parents but Irwin had refused to give him his parents' number.

At least immediately. After so many hours of grilling, Irwin finally gave him one. It just wasn't his parents' phone number. It happened to be the number for a pre-op transsexual escort service—a number he had picked up from reading the Goldenrod area phone book one day. It was one of several Irwin gave out in lieu, including numbers to the Day-Care Center, many restaurants and laundromats across Johto, and a Kanto Gym Leader's home, to name a few. Needless to say, the officer had despised him after that. Irwin still loved the sight of his face when the old coot had reached 'his parents'.

Feeling like they had put enough distance between them to hide, Irwin ducked into an alleyway, pulling Kris along inside the alley with him.

"Okay, we'll wait…" Irwin said, out of breath and pressed against the side of a building, "…for a moment or two. He's bound to…give up. Dumpling can't run that far."

"Irwin, is street performing illegal?" Kris asked, also pressed against the brick.

"Technically no." He knew his smile was twitchy and awkward and his voice was a little high and incriminating. "Sure the cops can get you on other little things but performing itself isn't against the law."

Kris did not looked reassured so Irwin sought to correct that.

"Really, Kris, it's nothing to worry about. I knew that officer. We don't get along. He would've caused us trouble just because he could. He's never been kind to me and I certainly didn't want him to be mean to you." _Mostly because I did not want to spend at least the night in jail for assaulting an officer. Technically assaulting but really more like defending a young lady's honor from vicious slander._

"But it's not illegal?"

Irwin smiled as he nodded.

Kris sighed as she canted her eyes downward. "And I suppose it's not like we have much of a choice otherwise…"

"Of course we have a choice," Irwin said. "This is just the better one. Better than being stuck out in the storm at least."

And they would be stuck out in said storm if he didn't get back out there.

"All right, Kris. I know plenty of streets I can perform on that ol' Dumpling won't set foot near. We'll try the one by the gym first."

-o-

Irwin sat hunched over, head in his hands, on a bench back in the city park. The sky above certainly looked darker and more menacing and yet they still had not found a place for the night. After many, many more tries and finally earning what the juggler used to know was enough money for a room, Irwin and Kris were in search of place with a vacancy.

Due in part to the youth tournament and who knew what else, there were no vacancies at the hotels they could have possibly afforded and the few that did have an opening suddenly had a rate hike beyond their means.

Irwin watched the concrete walkway and sighed. "Every place is so expensive. There's got to be a hotel for us somewhere… If not, maybe someone would be kind enough to rent us their floor for the night."

And if worst came to worst and no one would at least take Kris in for the night, Irwin swore to keep her safe through the storm. It would be far from the most comfortable sleep tonight but at least he would make sure she got through it.

"Irwin!" Kris shouted as she came back running. "I think I found a place! Come see!"

Matching her eagerness and her smile, Irwin followed her, offering Kris lots of praise and noting aloud how great it was for their luck to finally turn good today.

And then Irwin saw where they were and his eyes grew wide and his smile fell into open-mouthed shock.

"It's this place called Love Hotel. Look at all the hearts. Cute, huh?" Irwin heard Kris say, her voice bright and innocent.

"Not here," Irwin immediately replied. _Oh sweet mother of all Pokémon, not here._

"Huh? But that sign says they're running an all-night special," Kris said. "…Though, that's odd. Why wouldn't someone stay all night in a hotel?"

"Please…can we leave?" Irwin begged, his body shaking and sweating in nervousness, his heart pounding.

"But this place is cheap and—"

"Not here!" Irwin shouted.

He hadn't wanted to yell and he certainly had not wanted to make Kris flinch at the loudness of his voice but he saw no other way of making it definitively clear that they weren't going to stay here. As Kris, still very much confused and unaware, looked down at the road as if she had just been scolded, Irwin rested his hands on her shoulders reassuringly and bent down to her eye level.

"Kris, of all places, you don't want to stay at one of these. This place isn't for us, for you especially. We'll find a better hotel, I promise."

She nodded in agreement reluctantly but still asked, "Why is that place bad?"

With a straight face, Irwin replied, "Their beds have bugs in them."

Kris's face twisted in disgust and made it very clear that she couldn't believe that she had almost stayed at a place like that.

_If only she knew the half of it,_ Irwin thought, wiping away a small trail of blood from his nose he hoped Kris had not noticed.

Even though he knew they could have stayed at the love hotel—every once in a while someone checked into a love hotel to actually sleep, shockingly enough, it still wasn't a place Kris needed to be exposed to. Certainly there was one legitimate hotel out there for them to stay at. A love hotel really couldn't be their only option, right?

_If it is, our luck has a twisted sense of humor_ , Irwin groaned to himself.


	6. Chapter 6

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon.

-o-

Chapter Six: Bad Umbreon!

-o-

At last, as the wind began to howl and the sky rumbled, Irwin and Kris finally had a room. It was hardly outstanding and undoubtedly cheap but it was a solid roof over their heads and it was within their meager budget. It seemed all right, though the reception desk and the hallway did have a pungent soapy lavender smell to it. Not exactly pleasant but it was better than what could have been.

Kris entered the room first. "This is nice. Oh…" she said with a noticeable pause. "There's only one bed."

"We didn't have enough…" Irwin explained as he stared sheepishly down at the carpet and pushed his index fingers together in embarrassment. "I tried to explain to the guy at the reception desk how we needed two beds but the guy wouldn't strike a deal. It was this or nothing."

The guy at the reception desk also hadn't helped matters by first teasing Irwin about making a big deal of having to sleep in the same bed as his little sister. And when Irwin explained that Kris wasn't his sister, the guy looked at him, then at Kris, waiting outside and talking on her Pokegear, and then back at Irwin and then explained there were love hotels that catered to this sort of thing and then said that it wasn't his business but wasn't she a little young?

Irwin had just barely managed to curtail his outrage strictly to a stern glare as he explained in a low voice that they were here to sleep, as in rest, and then had asked the guy if he felt like a pervert now for assuming otherwise.

As they began to settle in, Irwin said, "You take the bed."

Surprised, Kris looked at him as she leaned her bag against the bed. "But where will you—"

"No worries," Irwin said. "Just watch closely." He removed his backpack and cape, laid down on the carpet, covered himself with his cape, and announced with gusto, "Ta da!"

Kris giggled as she laid across the bed. "And you're okay with that?"

Irwin nodded.

"Thank you but y'know you don't have to stay on the floor," Kris said as she sat up to make room. "'Til bedtime, you can sit with me, if you like—"

Irwin was quickly on the bed, his sudden presence and weight causing Kris to bounce and fall back. Kris laughed as she caught herself inches away from tipping off the bed. Irwin couldn't help but smile as he sat cross-legged beside her. He felt the proverbial swarm of Butterfree fluttering in his stomach. It was not entirely a bad feeling.

"I should let Eevee and Umbreon stretch," Kris then said, taking their Pokeballs from her belt and releasing them.

"So, wait, I thought your Eevee evolved," Irwin said and then pointed at her Eevee as it touched noses with Umbreon in greeting. "Or didn't it? Is that the same Eevee you told me about, or isn't it, is it?"

"No. He's bred," Kris explained. "Umbreon is his papa though."

"Amazing." Irwin leaned over and stretched out a hand to pet Umbreon. "I've never seen an Umbreon befo—"

With only a slight narrowing of his stare as a split-second warning, Umbreon bit Irwin's hand.

"Umbreon!" Kris shouted and Umbreon let go immediately and crouched down against the bed. She then turned to him and asked, "Are you okay? Let me see."

Kris took his hand and inspected his wound.

"It smarts but the skin's barely broken. I'll be fine," Irwin said, his face burning red with steam no doubt pouring from his ears as she held his hand. Luckily, Kris's attention was elsewhere.

"I'm so sorry," Kris said as she pressed firmly a folded tissue against the small droplets of blood welling up from his bite. "He's never done that before. Bit people, that is. Since he evolved, Umbreon has his grumpy moods around strangers but he mostly just hisses."

"It's okay, Kris," Irwin said and then grinned. "I'm just thankful he's not a Raticate."

"Thank you," she said, much relieved and still quite embarrassed. She checked his bite and saw the blood had already stopped and then she met eyes with Umbreon and pointed her index finger at him in reprimand, her voice stern. "You don't bite Irwin, got that? He's a friend and he's going with us, so be nice to him. Understood?"

Even though she wasn't talking to him, Eevee nodded and made a short agreeing sound as he rubbed his cheek against her knee and proceeded onward with smelling the bed. Umbreon turned his head away and then soon hopped from the bed and headed over and jumped up onto the table and laid down there. Kris shot him a critical eye. Umbreon gave a nod but he still flicked his tail rapidly.

"I can tell you're not serious," she said to Umbreon and then sighed. "He's just going to have to get used to you. …Umm, sorry. He's usually more behaved, I swear."

"Ah, not to worry, Kris. We'll be friends soon enough. 'Til then, I'll just have to make sure I don't smell tasty." Irwin laughed.

"Sorry. I really am," Kris said, still ashamed.

Irwin bore her no grudge. He never would. And he didn't think it was a fault of her training Umbreon. He knew she was great trainer and her Pokemon were very well behaved. But as with any animal, Pokemon had their own temperaments and, even with the best training, sometimes they responded against their trainer's wishes.

And Umbreon hadn't chomped down on him with his full force. In fact, he had only hurt him enough to let him know he did not want to be petted or that he did not like him or both. So despite biting him, he still showed signs of good training. Really, it probably had been all his fault for not asking.

Having sniffed the bedspread in his exploration of the room, Eevee approached Irwin and smelled him.

"Would be okay if I pet him?" After all, he was not about to make a repeat of his mistake.

"Sure," Kris said. "Eevee likes everyone."

Well, that proved to be true. Aside from a brief flinch in unfamiliarity and surprise from Irwin's first touch, Eevee had soon decided that he was all right and that his fingers were also tasty and that it was important that he get a good tight hold on his hand and gnaw on his knuckles as hard as his little baby fangs could sink in. Luckily, it was just little curious nips and was nothing like Umbreon's bite.

"Eevee, stop it!" Kris ordered as Eevee started to growl and kick his hind legs up against Irwin's arm.

"Ah, it's just some play fighting. He doesn't even have his back claws out. Really, Kris, his nips don't hurt that much- _ow-ow-ow!_ " he said as Eevee sunk his little teeth into the bend of soft skin between his thumb and index finger. Quickly, Irwin drew his hand away.

Kris tried to reprimand Eevee but the little guy was so wound up and wanted to play that he didn't pay much attention. It didn't help matters as the firmness in her voice gradually faded out as Kris watched her Eevee hop eagerly around the bed, pausing only to crouch down and wiggle his tail in the air, clearly unaware that he had done anything wrong and very much wanting the games to continue.

"I am so sorry," she repeated, the look on her face evident that she couldn't believe that this had happened _again_.

"It's all right, Kris," he assured. "It just pinched a lot. It's my fault anyway. Should've known the little puffball would be cute and feisty like his mama." Irwin smiled as he proceeded to spider-walk his hand across the bed and Eevee, taking notice, crouched down and prepared to pounce. Irwin wondered if perhaps Eevee had understood Kris's command after all, since there was less nipping and more nuzzling, licking, and batting at his hand this round of play.

In time, Eevee decided Irwin himself was less interesting than investigating the rest of the room or his backpack and hopped from the bed. Within moments, Eevee was on another adventure figuring out the mystery of what, if anything, was beneath Irwin's cape.

With Eevee entertained and Umbreon sulking on the table, Kris rummaged through her backpack and pulled out a smaller drawstring bag and some nightclothes. "I'm going to take a shower, 'kay?"

_For the love of her, don't make a stupid face,_ Irwin part-chanted, part-ordered himself, as Kris gathered what she needed and headed to the bathroom. After all, Irwin had no poker face—he was fairly positive the ability to conceal his emotions was not written in his DNA at all. Because whatever he was thinking at any given time usually showed itself on his face and this was just a bad time to make any sort of stupid face and show he was thinking anything. Nope, he was pretty sure he shouldn't be thinking anything about what Kris had said.

Kris paused in the bathroom doorway and smiled. "No peeking," she said, teasing.

Even though she was obviously joking, her words still took him off guard. His cheeks blushed, Irwin rose up from his seat on the bed and spoke dramatically, "I-I would never! Contrary to my rakish looks and grins, I am a gentleman, and your chivalrous knight. Nor I or anyone else will intrude upon you. You are safe with me, my lady." He placed a hand on his heart and bowed to her.

Kris smiled and giggled. "Okay then, _Sir_ _Irwin_."

As Kris closed the door behind her, Irwin couldn't help but grin and fall back onto the bed, his hands crossed over his heart. Despite her saying it in a tongue in cheek way, he still really liked being called 'Sir Irwin'. He kicked his legs in joy and excitement.

When his heart at last finally stopped soaring and came back down to earth, Irwin sat up and instantly became aware of Umbreon glaring at him from his table perch. As Umbreon flicked his tail rapidly from side to side, Eevee, now in the nearby chair, jumped up and batted at it at every swing.

Having the distinct impression, well, fear he should only be in the room with Umbreon with Kris nearby, Irwin left the room. He was pretty sure there were some working vending machines out by the reception desk.

-o-

Kris brushed her very slightly damp hair as she left the bathroom, her old clothes folded in hand. She had changed into her pajamas, a simple sleeveless top and comfy bottoms printed with sleeping Mareep. It was apparently the closest she would ever get to capturing one of the Electric sheep. She had wanted one from the start of her journey but never could find one in the grass south of Violet City, despite locals and other passing trainers assuring her otherwise.

Irwin was drinking a soda on the bed as Kris put away her shower supplies and sat with him. The television was on and, though it was too late for the news, there was a breaking report on the storm running. Things seemed to be going as bad out on Route 35 as the old man had warned.

"I got you a drink too," Irwin said. "Didn't know what you'd want so I bought one of each."

Kris thanked him and chose the lemonade.

"—Expect high winds and marble-sized hail tonight. High water is also to be expected and power outages. We encourage viewers to stay inside—"

It was fortunate for them that they had finally found a place to stay. It had been the first good thing to happen to them in Goldenrod. Never once had Kris had so much trouble for something so relatively small. She had never worried about her lodging before.

Then again, whenever she had been in a bind, she had her purse unpick-pocketed, the banks and ATMs worked, or the Pokemon Centers had a vacancy. Whenever dark spots appeared on her horizon, something always opened up for her. Strangely, not so much this time.

All in all, she was just grateful things had finally worked out for them and that Irwin hadn't died today.

As the report ended and switched over to the regular programming of a talent show for Pokemon and humans, Kris looked over at Irwin and asked, "How's your head?"

"Oh, it's fine. My mother always said I was hardheaded. Now we know it's true." He rapped his knuckles against his head as if to prove his toughness but winced in pain.

Kris smiled softly. "The doctor said the blast came from your weakest Voltorb. It's why you survived. You're very lucky, Irwin."

"My mother also used to say I was born lucky." And then he stared upward in reconsideration and said, "Or was it that I was lucky to have been born?" After a while of thinking, he shrugged his shoulders.

And then from beneath the bed came Eevee darting across the room, running in circles, sprinting and springing into the air as he played with a wad of fluff he had found. He made short determined growls and squeaks throughout his chase and every once in a while hissed. Umbreon from the table opened his eyes and looked up, saw his son was not battling a fearsome foe, and then went back to pretending to be asleep a little longer.

Kris watched Eevee's antics with amusement. "He's still a baby."

Eevee was quite literally the baby on her team, having only hatched from his egg a little over three weeks ago. While the rest of her team were her skilled partners and bodyguards, Eevee was much more of a pet for right now. Kris hadn't battled with him much, in part for not wanting him to get hurt and also because when she did try to battle with him, he wound up trying to play with the low-level wild Pokemon she had found for him instead. He was just not old enough to battle yet.

She heard the wind picking up outside. If the storm was not already here, it would be soon.

While Eevee had plenty of toys, he seemed equally happy playing with whatever he could find so Kris decided to wait before she tossed him his favorite squeaker. As it was, Eevee was still stalking the fluff. He was batting at it and making it roll around the carpet. Kris loved watching him have a grand time until she saw the fluff roll underneath the double-drawer desk and Eevee's head made a very solid bump against the faux mahogany. Eevee fell onto his back and started crying, legs flailing in distress.

Kris was immediately up and over to him. Umbreon was already at his son's side but Eevee wasn't responding to his papa's consoling. Kris picked him up and cradled him close, murmuring comforting words all the way to and as she sat back down on the bed. Eevee's cries were certainly less frantic but he was still very unhappy.

"There, there, little one. It'll be all right. It won't hurt as much very soon, I promise," Kris said, doing her best to comfort him. As she stroked his cheek, Eevee licked her fingers and tried to nurse from one but soon became frustrated again and whined louder when nothing came from it.

"Now, now, there's no need to cry," Irwin said reassuringly as he started juggling three small balls, capturing Eevee's attention and quieting him as he watched his movements intently. "Surely there's a smile in you left. You've just got to find it. I know you can. It's easy as one…" He started catching the balls in one hand."…Two…three!" He clasped his hands together and, with a sharp pop and a small burst of quickly dispersing pink smoke, revealed a string of colorful flags and a tiny rain of confetti.

"See? You found your smile," Irwin said and made a cookie appear with a little magic hand gesture.

At the sight of a treat, Eevee forgot about whatever ache he had left. He wagged his tail eagerly as Kris took the cookie and broke it in half for him.

"Thank you," she said, gently smiling. _It was really nice of him,_ she thought, genuinely touched by his help, as Eevee, already ready for the other half, pawed at her hand. _Eevee's happy again. Of course, Irwin's pretty good at entertaining._

To Kris's surprise and suspicion, Umbreon jumped on the bed and stood near Irwin. She hoped he was feeling friendlier, or at least was going to behave better, after watching Irwin calm his baby. He wasn't outright glaring at Irwin anymore but his stare was impassive. Kris wished he at least gave her some sign that he had warmed up to the juggler.

Actually, she really just hoped he didn't bite him again.

"Oh, so you wanna be friends now?" Irwin said as he wiggled his fingers in a showy manner. "Well, I'm sure I can make another treat appear—AH!"

Umbreon stuck his head in Irwin's sleeve and pulled out a small bag of cookies. Leaping away and running to the other side of the room, he tossed down the bag and immediately started ripping it open.

"Umbreon! No! That's mean!" Why on earth was he acting like this? Grumpy day or not, he had always behaved to her expectation. She knew he knew better than this. He wasn't a new addition to her team so there was no reason for his misbehavior.

Irwin laughed. "He can have them. I don't think he's giving them back anyway."

Kris sighed. "True, I guess." As her shoulders slumped in disappointment, Eevee wiggled out of her lap and hurried to join his father to get more cookies.

"Hey, want to see another trick?" Irwin asked and Kris nodded. "Actually it's a new act. Part of it, that is."

Kris watched as he attempted to do something with four Pokeballs. She wasn't positive of what was going on or what he was doing but it looked interesting. Though from his low groans, the fierce determination in his eyes to get it right, and how he kept dropping at least one of the balls throughout his demonstration, Kris guessed he wasn't as skilled with this trick as he was with all his others yet.

"It's a different kind of juggling," Irwin explained as he tried yet again. "Contact juggling. It's not like tossing. Contact is more about manipulating and isolating balls in contact with your body. There's lots of tricks to it and if it's done right, it's graceful and fluid and really cool. I've seen it done so many times and every time it was like real magic. But I can't do it. Right now, at least. All I can do is this."

He rolled two Pokeballs in a circle in one hand.

"It's still something, right? So you'll get the rest later on. After all, it took practice to learn how to juggle when you started out," Kris said as she picked up the other two Pokeballs and tried to spin them in a circle and managed to sort of do it but only very slowly. "Besides, I'd like to see more when you get better. It looks really neat."

-o-

_S-She thinks it's neat? And she wants to see more?_ Irwin couldn't believe what he had heard. Girls never thought his juggling was neat. Before he had sunk as deep as a Golem in the ocean in love with Kris, he had tried to impress girls with his juggling. Best reaction he had ever got from a girl had been a laugh—only in disbelief that he had thought he had a chance. Most girls thought his juggling was lame. Kris had encouraged him.

Eyes wide and bright, he unabashedly beamed. His mind was fuzzy and awash with happy thoughts. He just barely managed to hold back the urge to take her hands in his and kiss them and thank her for her support. After all, she had given him the best motivation ever. He wasn't very good at contact juggling yet but he would become the best in the world for her.

The torrential rain poured and pounded against the window. After a deep, sudden boom of thunder that vibrated the room, Eevee ran into Kris's arms. Irwin had to admit the thunder had startled all of them. Even Umbreon had crouched down and looked around as if searching for an attacker.

"It's okay, Eevee. It's just rain," Kris said, stroking a trembling, whining Eevee as he buried his face into the crook of her arm. "Lots of rain. Loud rain. Like in Mahogany Town, remember?"

The wind howled and something scraped against the window. The lights and the television flickered on and off before at last not coming back on at all. The room (and all the others and how much else of Goldenrod) had that telltale silence that came with the sudden power down of electricity.

"You all right, Kris? If you're afraid, I'll hold you. …If you want me to."

"Why?" she asked, confused. "The lights just went out. What's here to be afraid of?"

"Ohh… R-Right," he said, disappointed. And there went his idea and hope of hugging and comforting her through the dark and scary storm. He knew the whole plan was a major long shot and he would have been more shocked if she had said yes but he had tried, just in the rare case she had actually needed him.

_Of course, with the things she has done, why would she be afraid?_ Irwin thought, feeling like an idiot. _The girl who liberated the Radio Tower from Team Rocket single-handedly wouldn't need a nightlight. Or a teddy bear._

He felt the weight of something that he hoped was Umbreon hop onto the bed. His hope was confirmed as the yellow rings on Umbreon's body began to glow. It wasn't much light but it was enough to make their bodies discernible and illuminate their faces. The light was pretty but it also made Umbreon look very spooky. Irwin had enough reason to be unnerved around him in the light already and Umbreon in the dark wasn't much better. Or friendlier.

They sat listening to the storm. With every crack of lightning and thunder, Kris comforted Eevee.

Hearing the wind and rain and watching the rapid flashes of lightning, Irwin said in a hushed voice, "The lightning is fighting the rain."

"Huh? What does that mean?" Kris asked.

"Don't know," he said. "It's something my father said. The only interesting thing he had ever said."

"You've never mentioned your parents," Kris said. Which was true. Throughout their many phone calls, he had never spoken of his family.

Irwin gave a quick low laugh. "I'm not exactly their favorite, which is strange since I'm an only child."

"We…don't exactly get along. My parents have the imagination and whimsy of cold oatmeal. My father, in particular, is a hardnosed realist and cynic. Life is a fruitless struggle of working himself to death and never really getting anywhere for it. He wants me to be him but I can't. I like that the world is full of color. My father only sees gray."

_And not a particularly bright or dark shade of gray either,_ Irwin thought. _Just a very miserable, grim, bland gray._

"You ever go to the circus when you were younger?" Irwin asked and Kris nodded.

"I didn't. My father refused to take me. Said the circus was full of fools, slackers, and crooks too silly to grow up. But I snuck in to see it anyway. And for the first time I had seen how fun life could be, how the world wasn't all gray. I fell in love with everything. I wanted to join, share a part in the spectacle and spotlight that night. Juggling seemed to be the easiest way. And it's a little easier to practice at home than firebreathing."

"I tried teaching myself. Poorly, I know now. Broke a lot of things before I got better but I loved what I was doing. One day, I pretty much had to tell my parents everything. Didn't go over well…" Irwin gazed into the bedspread and frowned as he recalled his parents' shouts and insults again. "Deciding it was be a juggler and join the circus or bust, I wound up running away that night, joined a small family circus, and learned how to _really_ juggle. I was seven. Haven't had anything to do with my parents since."

"They probably miss you," Kris said.

"Doubt it. My mother wanted a girl and resented me. Lucky to be born. And my father holds grudges like dirty gamblers hold aces up their sleeves. I know I burned all bridges with him. Not like there was much of one to begin with. I swear if it wasn't for family resemblance, I'd believe I was adopted. I still say some sort of freak genetic mutation happened with me for me to be born to them. I always felt like I was a Goldeen being raised as a Magmar in a volcano when I was with them."

"Still you should try? Maybe they're sorry now?"

Her concern touched Irwin and he managed a weak smile. "Thanks, Kris, but I did. Once. But the only way they'd have me as a son was if I gave up everything I am and I can't do that so I told them I loved them and left. After all, Goldeen can't learn Flamethrower and I can't not see the world as anything but full of color. We are what we are."

"I've come to terms with it though and I think my life's been better. I've been blessed to see so many places, get to experience so many new things, and meet wonderful people wherever I go. Born lucky."

And it was not as if he never wanted to reconcile with his parents. Certainly it was something he hoped would someday happen. The door was always open from his side. It was his father that kept closing that door. Irwin hoped that with time he could show his parents the wonderful life he made for himself.

"It'll be a while until the power comes back, right?" Kris said. "Maybe we should turn in."

"Well, it has been a long day. Rest probably is best," Irwin said as he moved to the floor.

Kris turned down the covers and called for Eevee to climb under. She had asked Umbreon too but he preferred to remain at her feet. Kris soon slipped beneath the blankets as well.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked again as she put her arm around her curled-up Eevee and cuddled with him. "Maybe they have a cot you can sleep on."

"Nah, I don't mind. Fact I'd gladly take this floor over some other places I've slept," he assured her and grinned. _Helps that you're here._

"Well, I guess if you're okay with it…" Kris said. "'Night, Irwin."

"Good night, Kris."

_May the sweetest dreams keep you throughout the night, my dear._

-o-

Irwin awoke at some point in the middle of the night. He had no idea how late or even how early it was. All he knew was that the sound of the air conditioner kicking on had tossed him from his light sleep. Hand massaging the bit of a crick in his neck from sleeping on his backpack, Irwin sat up. Light from an outside lamppost shined in from between the gap in the curtains. Either the power was back on or Goldenrod was using its secondary generators—namely Electric Pokemon—until repairs could be made.

Figuring it was more comfortable than his backpack, Irwin took the remaining towels from the bathroom to use as a pillow. Briefly he considered turning on the television to check the time but decided it wasn't that important. Besides, he didn't want to wake Kris.

With Eevee nestled beside her, Kris slept peaceably. It really would have been a shame to wake her. He studied intently the shape of her nose, the curve of her ear, the play of light and shadow about her face, anything and everything he could admire. A bit of hair that had wandered over near her lips fluttered with her breath.

Until today, he had never seen her with her hair down, only in pigtails. He didn't mind the new sight. In fact, he quite liked her with her hair down. Maybe it was just hair and Irwin was making a to-do over nothing, but he felt kind of special for getting to see her with her hair down—after all, how many other people could say that?

To him, Kris was like a crystal. How ever large or small, every new view of her was another new facet of the crystal, a new side just as beautiful and worthy of a pause of admiration as the last. Knowing there were many other facets and aspects of her he had yet to see, Irwin couldn't wait to know what the next turn of the crystal would reveal to him.

As he continued to admire her and wondered whether or not to pull the slipped covers back around her shoulders, he heard a low growl rumble through the quiet room. Irwin looked over and saw Umbreon's red eyes piercing him through the dark. Umbreon hissed, his fangs glinting faintly in the low-lit room. Irwin slowly slid down and away from the bed and hid beneath his cape.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gratitude goes out to thePigFaced for leaving kudos on the last chapter. There may have been a guest kudos as well but I can't remember so I'll give thanks anyway. Thanks goes to everyone who gave kudos.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading.

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon.

-o-

Chapter Seven: Rolling Out of Goldenrod

-o-

From various reports, mostly those from the radio station, it seemed like Goldenrod had weathered last night's storm better than Ecruteak had. Kris supposed it was because the storm had truly appeared out of the blue in Ecruteak and Goldenrod had a few hours warning at least. Goldenrod's buildings were also more modern than Ecruteak's and were constructed with more safety failsafes as well.

From what Kris had heard, Ecruteak had taken much more structural and flooding damage as a result of the storm. Having endured the occasional flood from their surrounding rivers, Goldenrod had plans and measures in place. Ecruteak did not and had never really needed any before. Flooding, especially of this magnitude, was a rare occurrence in Ecruteak.

Not that Goldenrod was without harm. Water was still up to Kris's knees this morning and fallen trees and debris blocked the streets and much of Route 35. Secondary generators brought power to selective necessary portions of the city, mostly the hospitals and the Pokemon Center. Luckier than Ecruteak or not, Goldenrod was in just as much state of emergency.

At the Pokemon Center, Kris sat on a windowsill and looked out on the city while her and Irwin's Pokemon had their breakfast. Well, everyone but Eevee, who had wolfed down his portion and proceeded to stick his front paws into his bowl and push his dish around, occasionally bumping into someone else's bowl—a particular favorite was his father's, despite Umbreon's reprimanding hisses and growls.

"So…how do you guys eat?" Kris heard Irwin ask his Voltorb. "Electrodes have mouths but you guys don't. But you do eat, I know that much. I just can't figure out how and you're not gonna show me, are you?"

His Voltorb did not respond. Mostly they just stared up at him, a few with annoyance in their eyes.

Kris sighed softly as she stared out onto the damage, wishing she didn't have to leave the city to be somewhere else very soon. She already knew she was on orders but it was only for a short official public appearance. It wasn't even her grand introduction as the new Champion. Really, there were much more important things she could be doing as the Champion.

Turning on her Pokegear and switching it onto its phone function, she was immediately greeted to a notice of forty-eight missed calls and twenty-six voicemails. They were all from Commissioner Everight. Having need to speak with her anyway, Kris called her back.

"Kris!" Commissioner Everight immediately shouted, not even giving her the chance to stay hello. "Thank goodness! Did you have your Gear off? You shouldn't do that! I've been trying to contact you since yesterday! Where are you? You weren't caught in that dreadful storm, were you?"

"Not directly but I did have to stay the night. I'm in Goldenrod and—"

"G-Goldenrod? Oh dear, not good. Not good at all." The commissioner mumbled to herself as Kris heard the sound of papers being shuffled about. "All right, we'll send a car, no, a jet—"

As usual, the commissioner was wound tighter than a Poliwag's belly spiral. "I appreciate the thought, ma'am, but actually I was wondering if it would be possible if I could stay in Goldenrod?"

"No, no, dear. We need you here!" Everight insisted. "Preparations are nearly complete. The media is starting to arrive. You need to get here."

"Yes, but have you seen the news? Goldenrod and Ecruteak need our help. Could you delay the ceremony for a few days? I'm asking no more than a week at the most. I'd like to stay and help—"

"I know you do but you're needed here," Everight said, the repeat reminder frustrating Kris. "Think of it like this. You'll be helping Goldenrod and Ecruteak and all of Johto by providing a bright, hopeful story amid all the disaster relief coverage."

Kris rolled her eyes. "I should be helping by staying and helping."

"Now, Kris, you have your duties and obligations to uphold. We need you in Bluebell Town. You're our Champion—"

"Yes, and as the Champion, should I not stay and help?" Kris said, a firm edge creeping into her voice. "Do you want the media to show me in the rescue and cleanup or tucked away in a safe little town away from the wreckage? Which do you think would look better in the eyes of the people?"

"You are scheduled to appear in Bluebell Town," Everight said with finality. "Now we need you here practically yesterday. We have lots to do. We have so much to do to prepare you for the big, big day! I have a plane ready for you. It'll be there in an hour and a half tops."

"No, no, Commissioner," Kris said. "I'll just take Pidgeot. He'll get me there in time."

"No, Kris," Everight said. "We can't take any chances. Stay there and wait for us."

"And in those same hours waiting, I can already be on my way." Kris did not care if she sounded angry. Everight was being absolutely infuriating. _I wonder if she ever had Lance on a leash. I bet not. I can't see Everight telling Lance to do anything._

"Pidgeot will take too much time," Everight said. "We have too much to go over with you."

"The ceremony isn't for another two days, correct?" Kris said. "So I'll get there the night before at the latest. It'll be fine."

"No, Kris, it won't. Wait in Goldenrod," Everight ordered. "Geez, between you and Lance… Tell me, is the desire to show up at the last moment just a prerequisite of Champions?"

"I don't think so, ma'am," Kris said, "but a desire to help others might."

"Ah, yes, chronic superhero syndrome. You and Lance have that in common as well," Everight said, the displeasure in her voice making it clear how much she liked the shared trait. "And while you're doing whatever you can while you wait, promise me you'll be careful. Just don't get hurt, especially anything that would leave any visible scars. Makeup can work only so much magic, dear."

"Yes, ma'am, I promise. Bye," Kris said and immediately stuck her tongue out at her Pokegear as she turned it off.

"Well, that sounded frustrating," Irwin said as he filled Umbreon's water bowl up. As he set it down beside him, Umbreon hunched down and glared at him and then growled low in his throat before finishing his idea of a thank-you with a hiss. Kris reprimanded him but that didn't seem to cause much change in his mood. When Irwin at last backed far enough away, he finally stopped glaring at him and turned to his water dish to lap up a drink.

Kris leaned her head back against the wall and breathed a long sigh. "They treat me like I'm a child. I swear Everight thinks she's my mom—wait, let me do Eevee's water. When he's done drinking, he'll put his paws in and splash out the rest if you're not careful. I'm trying to train him to stop."

"So we're heading to Bluebell Town?" Irwin said as Kris filled up Eevee's water dish. "Ah, it's a nice little town. Pretty in the spring. Lots of blue fields of bluebells. …So where is it?"

"Between Ecruteak and Olivine," Kris said as she gave Eevee his water. "On Route 39, near MooMoo Farm. They built up a small town around it and made a Miltank farming community."

"Must have done it fairly recently then," Irwin said. "No wonder I've never heard of it before."

"Yea. The ceremony I'm supposed to appear at is to celebrate the town's completion. Kind of like the town's birth— _Eevee_ , _no_ ," Kris ordered firmly, snapping her fingers, as she saw Eevee about to put his paw into his water dish.

He looked up at her and tipped his head to the side, looking confused as to why what he was doing was wrong. He usually didn't get into big trouble but he was young and curious and had much to learn. Right now, Eevee had to learn that his water dish was not a toy. And as Kris thought about it, she realized that she should probably train him out of playing with his food bowl soon too. He looked adorable running around with it though…

But playing in his water bowl caused messes and that she definitely had to train him out of. As he tried to raise his paw a little further, Kris repeated her command. A few more sneaky tries and a few more firm commands and finger snaps later, Eevee finally put his paw down and earned a treat.

"There you go, Eevee. You drink this water. It's not to play in," Kris said, petting Eevee on the head, earning a short happy squeak from him. "We don't have much time but I'd like to see what we can do before we have to take off."

"Of course," Irwin said, nodding. "I bet you'll have Goldenrod cleaned up in no time."

"We don't have that much time," Kris said, lightly laughing, as she recalled her team back into their balls. Everyone but Eevee. More often than not, she simply carried Eevee or let him walk beside her or perch on her shoulder. After all, there was much he needed to learn about the world and there was no better way of teaching him than to let him be out in the world to see it.

-o-

Irwin had figured Goldenrod would want as many people as possible to help in the cleanup and rescue but, for some reason, most people had ignored Kris when she had asked how she could help, even after he had told them she was the Champion. It must have been because of her age, he had figured. It was the only thing it could have been. Everyone had believed she was some impudent rookie until Whitney vouched for Kris. And when everyone had seen how strong her Pokemon actually were, suddenly Kris couldn't be in enough places.

Kris and her team were running here and there, clearing fallen trees, coursing the water out of town, and carving out ditches for the run-off. Even her smaller Pokemon like Umbreon were busy carrying supplies and messages back and forth. Irwin was happy watching her help and seeing people's faces change from being pestered by her persistence and doubting Whitney's assurance that she wasn't some little rookie girl getting in their way to surprise and awe and finally outright respect for her.

And while all this busy business was going on, Irwin's main task was…watching over Eevee. It wasn't the only job he had. He ran errands and swept trash and debris, anything he could manage to do. Neither Irwin nor his Voltorb could burn trees or lift flood-stalled cars over someone's head but they could do whatever they could to help and so they did so.

His Voltorb were providing a temporary power source and Irwin and other larger, stronger, and overall faster young men than him were shoveling mud and muck away. Even Eevee found a way to help by picking up nearby twigs and placing them in a pile, though he most likely just thought everyone was playing a strange pick-up game.

At the time, Irwin had thought shoveling mud would be the hard work he needed to feel like he had truly done something to help and indeed he was feeling something the longer he shoveled. Right now, he felt a quiver running through his arms as he carried his mud over to the wheelbarrow. The problem with hard work was that it required much physical strength, something Irwin generally lacked. All the other burly young men carried their shovels piled high back and forth easily while Irwin huffed and puffed to carry the same load. He had the sense the other fellows were just tolerating him because his heart was in the right place, except his muscles weren't.

Still it wasn't like he couldn't sit around and do nothing. Much as he had his grumbles about the local police, Goldenrod was still a kind of a second home to him. After all, he had spent a quarter of his short life living in or around the city. Even though he could only hope to play a bit part, he still had a part to play. He was still a young man of able body.

Until the other guys decided he wasn't of able body.

"Thanks, kid," said one of the guys, even though they were probably the same age, just of vastly different physical condition. "We really appreciate the help but you're gonna give yourself a heart attack working like that. Kinda look like you're already there. Feel all right?"

"Can't really…feel my arms," Irwin said, hunched forward and out of breath, his face as red as his cape. "I think I broke them."

"That'll happen," the guy said, flashing a sympathetic smile. "You're gonna feel a whole lot worse tomorrow."

Irwin wished the guy hadn't told him that. If he felt any worse tomorrow than he felt at the moment, then he was probably going to spend the majority of their time in Bluebell Town groaning in a bed and missing out on seeing Kris at the ceremony.

"Get some water at the relief tent. Take a break. We'll get the rest," he said, pointing at a makeshift stand at the far end of the street. "We appreciate the help but don't kill yourself out here, kid."

Irwin gave thanks—whether his thanks was coherent, he wasn't sure, though—and nodded woozily before he started stumbling down toward the relief tent.

And then a wiggly thought bubble popped in his head and he remembered he was supposed to be watching Kris's Eevee so he called him to follow. Running through his pile of sticks and scattering them about, Eevee quickly caught up and padded along beside him, still proudly holding his last found stick in his mouth.

With enough time and water, Irwin finally caught his breath and his dizziness and wobbliness subsided. The nurse that might have been Nurse Joy but Irwin couldn't remember who she had been had said he had been in the early stages of heat stroke and right now he needed to stay cool and drink water. Irwin figured he was back to helping out doing light stuff again. It wasn't exactly how he had planned things to go but his arms still felt pretty much like Tentacool tentacles anyway so it probably was all he could manage to do.

Beside him sat Eevee, snout-first in a snack bag of bite-sized peanut butter cookies. Irwin didn't know how or where he had found them but he certainly hadn't found them at the relief tent. _Great,_ Irwin thought wryly, _he's following right in his father's footsteps…err…paw steps._

"Hey, puffball, come up for air a sec," Irwin said, giving the tip of Eevee's ear a gentle tug. "Come on. You have to breathe at some point."

Eevee pulled his snout out of the bag and looked up at Irwin. There were cookie crumbs in his puffy cream-colored collar.

"I know I'm not your trainer so you probably won't listen to me but this happened while you were under my watch so I think I should try and Kris wouldn't tolerate this behavior either," Irwin said. "You're not supposed to steal cookies. Or anything actually, but certainly not cookies. Stealing cookies is a bad thing your papa taught you. Don't do it."

Munching away on his bite of cookies, Eevee continued to simply stare up at him.

Unable to tell if there was a single thought running through the little guy's head, Irwin bowed his head and sighed in frustration. "Y'know, this would be easier if you at least showed some sign that you understood me. It really isn't hard to understand. Don't take things just because you wanted them. It's okay if someone offers you cookies but you can't just snatch cookies and run. That's stealing. Stealing is bad. Good Eevee don't steal, okay?"

Now wagging his tail for some reason only Eevee knew, Eevee persisted on with just staring at him. Maybe Kris would have instantly known what Eevee was saying but Irwin needed a bit more response out of the puffball. Irwin had never had an Eevee. He had Voltorb and he understood his Voltorb just fine and they were just large balls with eyes. He wasn't used to reading the body language of a Pokemon with a tail, mouth, ears, an actual body with arms and legs to move and communicate with…

"Hey, little one," Irwin said, his stare and tone both level, "I don't know what you're trying to tell me and I'm not sure if you understood me so give me a squeak if you've understood what I've been saying."

Eevee did not respond.

Once again, he breathed a frustrated sigh and raised his arms up in defeat. "Figures you're too young to understand—"

"Oh, he understands you fine," said a nurse, who had been watching him have a one-sided talk with Eevee and wore an amused smile. "He just didn't steal those cookies. Some boys gave them to him. He's not saying anything because he didn't steal from anyone. He's not going to agree with anything he didn't do."

"That right?" he asked Eevee and Eevee squeaked and nodded. "Munch away then."

And Eevee happily did so.

"Hey, y' know, you…could have…" Irwin began to say but trailed off once he saw that the nurse had gone elsewhere. He still believed she could have told him that Eevee was listening sooner. Would have been far less aggravating knowing his words weren't going through one pointy brown ear and out the other.

"Oh well," he sighed and then looked down at Eevee, making little happy squeaks inside the bag as he munched down on his treat. "Y'know, you're smarter than you look. And that's hard to say when you've got a snack bag muzzled over you."

"Hey!" he heard Kris call as she came running with Whitney in her softball uniform a step behind. "The dig crew told me I could find you here. You all right?"

Refusing to let her see him be idle, Irwin rocketed out of his seat and stood waiting for her. _After all, a gentleman should stand when a lady makes her entrance and greet her._

"Oh yes! Never better! Just needed a nip of fresh water in me and I'll be ready to shovel the entire main street," Irwin said, grinning, as he flexed one of his arms for her. Luckily for him, he hadn't rolled his sleeve up and Kris couldn't see that his aching muscle was still too worn out to contract.

"That's great but we don't have the time for you to do that. Even with the extra delays, Everight's plane should be here soon. We have to head out." And then to Whitney, she said, "I'm sorry I can't stay longer. I've got orders. Honestly, I'd rather be here or aiding Ecruteak."

"It's all right," she said, laying a reassuring hand on Kris's shoulder. "We've got things covered. Don't worry, Goldenrod will shine again soon enough."

"Wait," Irwin said. "If the plane is almost here, why aren't we waiting for it?"

"Because I want to take Pidgeot," Kris said and then she smiled, leaned down, and greeted her Eevee, his fluffy tail practically vibrating in joy at her return.

At the sight of her Eevee, Whitney squealed and immediately picked him up and nuzzled cheek to cheek with him. Although he seemed confused by her affections with her being a stranger, Eevee didn't seem to mind, though he seemed more eager to go to Kris and followed her every move. Whitney asked where she had caught him and Kris explained how she had gotten her first Eevee from Bill.

Whitney pouted heavily. "He's never given me an Eevee…"

"Well, I had barely met Bill when he gave him to me. It was a lucky chance and he needed a trainer," Kris said as she rubbed underneath Eevee's chin. Clearly a preferred spot, Eevee raised his head and treaded his paws in the air at his trainer's affection.

"And that little Eevee evolved into that fierce-looking Umbreon," Whitney said as she tried to gain Eevee's attention but failed now that Kris was petting him. "This has just been your year, hasn't it, _new_ Champion? Congrats, by the way."

"Thank you…" Kris said, peering down as she tried to hide her blush. Aside from Irwin himself, of course, no one else had referred to her as the new Champion yet. The new recognition seemed to embarrass her a little. "But don't let Umbreon fool you. He's all pudding on the inside, I swear."

_Forgive me, my dear,_ Irwin thought, managing to keep his scoffs to himself, _but if that glowering, hissing,_ biting _cat-rabbit-thing is full of pudding, I can't imagine how nasty and bitter that pudding tastes._

"Umm, excuse me, Kris…" Irwin said, getting the odd feeling his presence was pretty much forgotten in the wake of Whitney cuddling Kris's Eevee, "but wouldn't the plane be faster?"

"Yea, but so what?" Kris said. "I'm the Champion so I should have the say on how I want to travel and I'm arriving on Pidgeot."

"Oh, I'm keeping you, aren't I?" Whitney said as she reluctantly handed Eevee back to Kris but not before getting in one last goodbye nuzzle. "It was so great to see you and I appreciate all your help."

"I really wish I could stay but Everight would have my head, I think," Kris said as she returned Eevee back into his Pokeball. "Or she'd send in a crew to snatch and rush me off. Either way, I have to be going."

Putting away Eevee back into her bag, she pulled out another Pokeball that Irwin assumed held her Pidgeot. His guess was soon confirmed. Her Pidgeot came out from its ball with its wings spread and its head raised. It came out making an honestly frightening battle cry.

More used to the little birds and the Pidgey that hopped along and pecked at tossed bread in the National Park, Irwin had never seen a fully-evolved Pidgeot before and never realized until now what big and scary birds they were. Kris's, in particular, was ready to fight.

Sharp eyes darting about in search of an opponent and finding none, Pidgeot soon turned to Kris for direction. Kris approached it (and if it wasn't for it being her Pokemon, Irwin would have strongly advised her not to) and cupped her hands around its face. Irwin watched in amazement as her bird of prey softened into a gentle songbird. She had told him once that Pidgey had been her first capture and their long time together showed.

"I know you've worked hard already," she said to Pidgeot as it brushed its beak through her hair in a quick greeting, "but do you think you could fly me and Irwin to Bluebell Town? You feel up to that?"

Immediately rising up and spreading its large wings, Pidgeot puffed up with pride and strength.

"That might be a yes," Whitney said, smiling with Kris. "Y'know, your Pidgeot looks so strong. Maybe after the cleanup, you and I should have a rematch."

"You could have Everight turn it into a charity match," Irwin suggested, "with all ticket sales benefiting the recovery of Ecruteak and Goldenrod."

"That's actually not a bad idea," Whitney said, absolutely beaming with excitement. "And we should get Morty too. Maybe we could have a double battle!"

"As really great as that sounds…" Kris said before drooping her shoulders and sighing. "…I'm not sure I want to get Everight involved. If she doesn't say no, she'll blow up everything into a big media frenzy. It won't even be about our rematch after she gets done."

"Yea, but maybe her turning into a big media frenzy will be a good thing this one time," Irwin said. "More people that go, the more it helps."

At that, Kris had to give a nod to the side in agreement. "Yea, but that's only if she'll say yes to it. …I'll ask her, though. Can't promise anything."

"Oh, she'll say yes. The League can't pass up stuff like that," Whitney said, hugging Kris goodbye. "Take care and come back anytime."

"I will," Kris promised as she hopped onto Pidgeot's back. "I'll come back and help just as soon as the ceremony is over."

When Kris was settled, Pidgeot rose from its crouched position and began to flutter its wings and ready itself for flight.

"Wait, Pidgeot! Irwin's coming too," Kris said. "Hurry up, Irwin. Pidgeot's ready to go."

"Uh, sure…but umm, maybe we should wait for the plane…" Irwin said, trying not to let the tremble in his legs be too obvious.

The issue was that Irwin had never flown on anything before and his ideal first experience with flying had never involved hopping onto a Pokemon's back and setting off into the sky. He had figured he would have flown first on a plane where there would be plenty of room and seatbelts and metal walls surrounding him.

Pidgeot, on the other hand, just had enough room on its back for two people and only because Kris was small and there were no seatbelts or anything to hold onto for safety and there were no walls to hold him and if he fell, he would meet the ground unless Kris managed to maneuver Pidgeot and catch him.

Much as he trusted Kris and knew what an excellent trainer she was, he also didn't want to risk that chance and find out what would happen in said situation.

As he fretted and hesitated, even though he knew he would go with her because he wanted to go with her and didn't want to end their travels together over something so small, Kris eventually figured out the problem. "…You've never ridden on a Pidgeot before, have you?"

"I've never been off the ground higher than I can jump," Irwin said, flashing a nervous smile.

"Well, there's nothing to be afraid of," Kris said and smiled reassuringly. "Come on. We've got to get going if we're going to miss Everight's plane."

"Yes, but…I—um…"

"Oh, stop being a silly boy and hop on already," Whitney said, grinning as she pushed a reluctant Irwin from behind toward Pidgeot. "She's got places to go and you're holding her up."

Irwin dug his heels into the ground and tried to stop her but to no avail. Irwin wound up on Pidgeot's back. He knew he would though. From the moment she said yes, he knew he would eventually have to follow her into places he didn't want to go but would for her.

"Ready?" he heard Kris ask as Pidgeot stood and readied itself to soar.

"…As I'll ever be," Irwin said, his voice cracking in fear.

Quickly, he looked around for some place he could hold onto but there really wasn't anything he could anchor himself to and he didn't think he could grip its feathers. He was far more likely to wind up pulling them out in terror and neither Pidgeot nor Kris would like that. He was pretty sure that if he did see land again, all that would earn him would be several swift, angry pecks. Most likely to the head if Pidgeot was quick enough and it sure looked quick.

As he searched and struggled to find safety, Pidgeot opened its wings and began to gain loft. The ground gradually growing smaller underneath them, Irwin panicked and shouted and quickly wrapped his arms around Kris's waist and held on for dear life. Luckily, Kris did not seem to mind.

…And really Irwin didn't seem to mind after a while as well. Sure, he was at a constant, even level of terror and he didn't like the feel of his legs just dangling in the not-solid air. He could feel his heart beating in his ears and he was shaking like he had a personal earthquake in his stomach but the sky was pretty and flying had its thrills and Kris and Pidgeot knew what they were doing.

And well, much as he was afraid and he wanted to be back on land pronto, there was one thing that was absolutely wonderful—getting to hold Kris and feel the light press of her back against him. The warmth spreading from her touch burned away at his fear and kept it at bay. His heart and mind had fluttered and floated off to farther brighter skies and taken him with them. Once in a while, Irwin could rest his cheek gently on her pink cap, close his eyes, and smile.

Maybe, he supposed, flying on Pidgeot wasn't so bad after all.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank the readers who left kudos since the last chapter. If there were any... It's been a while since the last update... Between work and some close holiday specials looming, I had to set aside this chapter for a bit. If there's any compromise, here's a nearly 10,000 word chapter. I put short chapters in my tags but slowly and surely, my chapters are growing...
> 
> As always, thanks for reading.

Story Title: Somebody's Fool

Disclaimer: I still don't own Pokemon. Might own a few OCs but probably not.

-o-

Chapter Eight: Gather 'Round Bluebell Town

-o-

There was nothing like flying on Pidgeot, Kris believed. It was one of those everyday delights, the kind most Trainers never thought about and took for granted and sorely missed when they suddenly couldn't take off. There was something in being surrounded by nothing but blue, the wind in one's face, the feel of Pidgeot's heartbeat and movements beneath her, and for a fleeting moment, being in sync as they soared through the sky as one. Kris loved flying on Pidgeot. Faulkner would understand. Irwin didn't.

"You all right back there?" she asked, peering over her shoulder.

Irwin made the same high whimpering sound as before and Kris guessed it meant he was okay. Arms wrapped around her waist, he was shaking and clinging to her in fear. He wasn't used to flying. Actually, this was his first time off the ground. He didn't seem to like flying and Kris didn't see why. They weren't in any danger so he didn't have to be scared. He probably just needed a bit more time to get used to it, to see what a wonder it was. Kris had been a little nervous her first flight too but Pidgeot was her pokemon so she knew he wouldn't let her fall.

"We're going down," Kris said, leaning with Pidgeot as he followed her orders and circled down into the clearing to land.

Landing in an open rest area beside the dirt road running through the forest leading to Bluebell Town, Kris guessed they were about an hour and half walk away. By now, letting her legs stretch a while sounded great and Irwin was doubly happy just be on the ground, getting down on his hands and knees and kissing the ground until a bug flew up his nose and forced him to sneeze.

After every flight, Kris looked and felt through Pidgeot's feathers and made sure his wings weren't damaged or that he hadn't strained himself for her. While he would answer her truthfully if she asked him enough times, Faulkner and Violet City's Nurse Joy had given her plenty of advice and taught her how to recognize the most common flying injuries. Aside from needing a well-deserved rest, Pidgeot didn't seem to have any other aches. He probably could have flown them the rest of the way if Kris had forced him but after flying ten hours with only a break for lunch, Pidgeot had earned his sleep.

Hugging him around his neck as he trilled in joy, Kris thanked Pidgeot for all his hard work and returned him to his Pokeball.

"Flying wasn't so bad, now was it?" Kris said cheerily as they walked along the dirt road toward Bluebell Town as a swarm of chipper, chatty Ledyba and Ledian passed by overhead.

"No, no, there were some good parts to it…" Irwin said as Kris saw him stare up sheepishly into the growing pink sunset and blush. "I just don't like the whole high-up part."

"You won't fall off Pidgeot," Kris assured. At least he had found something he liked about flying—that was good.

"It's not the fall that frightens me," Irwin said, flashing a twitchy, nervous smile. "It's what breaks my fall, my face, my spine, all my squishy inside parts that scares me."

"But think of what you liked about flying… If you just focus on the good, you'll get over that fear, I know you will." Her light tap on his arm was meant to be an encouragement but Irwin immediately gasped, grabbed his arm protectively, and winced in pain. Concern flooded her. "You all right?"

"Y-Yeah, c-course, I am," Irwin stuttered and smiled through his ache. "My arms…just a little sore."

At first, Kris couldn't figure out why—he hadn't wrapped his arms around her waist that hard—and then it clicked. "Must've been all that shoveling you did," she realized. "I'm so sorry. I didn't think about that."

"I-It's fine. I-I'm fine. Really, I am," he assured.

"Sorry…" Kris said. "I'd give you a potion but I don't think they work on people."

Irwin flashed her a grateful smile as they headed onward toward Bluebell Town.

A lot had gone on since Kris had last passed by MooMoo Farms on her way to Olivine City. In that time, a cute little town had sprung up and around that one expansive Miltank farm. There was enough milk now to allow passersby the opportunity to buy more than one bottle a day and farms were experimenting with making cheeses and yogurts. There were talks of selling MooMoo milk in regular grocery stores, instead of just PokeMarts, across Johto and even into Kanto.

Walking down the main street through town, Kris watched as the curious Hoothoot peeked through the trees as she and Irwin passed by. She soon found Everight, clipboard in one hand and the other brandishing a pen, giving out orders as was her natural state of being.

Everight had what was known as a Bellsprout body—she was tall and thin and the vast majority of her body was her head. Her head wasn't particularly larger than her body but her seafoam green hair was big and fluffy and somehow she managed to keep it perfectly orderly bound together with a large cream-colored bow that reminded Kris of a Vaporeon's head fins. Kris still hadn't asked her where she bought it. Kris wanted one just so she could make her ears look like Vaporeon fins too.

"Well, now she arrives…" Everight said, her tone dripping with sarcasm, as she held her head high and adjusted her small, rectangular glasses. "Now when I say I have a plane for you, you're supposed to stay put and get on it. Don't think I'll forget what you did, missy. Hopping on Pidgeot was fine back when you were nobody but you can't just do whatever you want now that you're Champion. Am I understood?"

"If you're worried about something bad happening, Pidgeot is far more safer than any plane," Kris said and then looked to Irwin for agreement. "We got here fine, didn't we, Irwin?"

Irwin was still noticeably shaken and his forced smile was twitchy. "…Uh, yeah, sure, we did." He then turned his head to the side and not-so-quietly murmured, "Some walls around us would've been nice…"

Everight gave a sharp, disbelieving stare that confirmed her point as Kris's smile begged she overlook him. She tipped her head toward Irwin and said through her weak laugh, "First flight."

That little fact didn't seem to convince her. "The point of the matter is not all about safety, Kris," Everight said, sliding her pen behind her ear. "It's about you listening. Listening and _obeying_. You're not some Trainer now. You represent Johto and Kanto. Your actions and decisions have far-reaching effects now. You can't act like a child anymore."

"Funny, because you seem to think you're my mother," Kris said dryly.

Everight's cheeks turned red but otherwise remained composed. "It is my job to make sure you are organized and prepared and on schedule. Now come with me," she said, snapping her fingers and heading off. "We are far behind and have far too much to go over with you for the big, big day."

Puffing her cheeks in annoyance, Kris reluctantly followed her in tow with Irwin a step behind her. She somewhat listened as Everight went over the various things they would go over in preparation for the ceremony as she pointed out what had already been done to decorate for the event. Media had already arrived and gathered up enough material for their broadcast and plenty more to promote tourism to the area. Lovely hanging baskets hung from every street post, except from those outside the town hall, which were decorated with white banners marked with MooMoo Farm's insignia, now adopted as the town crest.

Entering a meetinghouse elected for the League's use and looking around at all the equipment and the overall setup, Kris could not believe all the people busily walking about were in some way here because she was here. Sure, they were here for the ceremony but the League did not make to do over every little town that popped up. These people were here because someone in the League had decided that the Champion should appear at this town's dedication and for no other reason.

Stopping in the makeup department, Everight spoke briefly to a young man who nodded and headed off in a hurry while Kris peeked through the many products set out on two tables pushed together. Everything was laid out in a chaotic-orderly manner but Kris tried not to disturb anything, mostly because she had no idea what most of it was. There were sprays and bottles and jars of hair styling products Kris had never seen in any store but was pretty sure were very expensive.

"This stuff is weird," Irwin said, picking up one of several test tubes filled with different colored liquids. "These aren't even labeled. What is this supposed to be?"'

"Oooh, that's a secret, our secret, and we won't tell," said a girlish voice as a young man with light blue hair, save for a single streak of bubblegum pink, peeked out from crouching behind Irwin. Before Irwin could turn toward him, the young man was gone.

However, he immediately returned, peeking out from Irwin's other side. "And it's labeled. Don't you see?" the young man said, taking the test tube from him and turning it to show its sticker scribbled with letters of an unreadable language. "But only we know what it says."

"We? There's only one of you!" Irwin said, still perplexed as to how he had gotten around him so quickly.

"Wrong again!" Two similar voices said as one as the identical twins, smiling and giggling in their own amusement, hopped out from hiding behind Irwin.

"You're zero for two," one of the twins said. Both wearing the same purple pinstripe pants and graphic T-shirt of an Oddish made out of spattered paint, Kris had no idea how to tell them apart yet. Actually, she was still trying to figure out if they were really boys and not girls with really short haircuts….

"What are you talking about? How I am zero for two?" Irwin said as the twins, now standing beside one another with their hands clasped behind their back, grinned angelically and giggled for reasons only known to them.

As the juggler asked again a bit more sternly and the twins continued to simply grin at him and say nothing more, Everight called Kris over to a beautiful dark-skinned woman with cream-colored hair cut in a stylish modern pageboy. She possessed the elegance and composure of a Persian, so much so as Kris approached her she wondered if the gorgeous woman's violet eyes were sizing her up as prey.

"This is Taylor Tess. She'll be your stylist," Everight explained.

"A pleasure to meet you in person," she said in a slow, silky voice as she bowed to Kris and kissed her hand. To Kris's surprise, her glossy white lipstick did not leave white lips on her skin. "Ever since you became Champion, I've poured over every image I could acquire of you in preparation to being your stylist. I would like to have a chat to finalize a few concepts and add just the perfect final personal touches. Do you like jasmine tea?"

"Uh…I've never had any before but I'd be happy to talk, ma'am," Kris said, taken aback in the presence of such a beautiful woman, a woman whose job it was to clothe her awkward, scrawny eleven-year-old body in the most gorgeous and perfectly flattering outfits.

"It'll be my treat then. And _please…_ " she said, smiling, her smooth voice sending chills through Kris. "Call me Tess."

Kris couldn't see herself in and didn't think it was right for her to wear anything Tess had made for her. She would probably have to make so many adjustments to get her beautiful clothes to fit her gawky body that she would ruin the outfit. It would be such a waste. Kris didn't think she could ever wear something right made by such a gorgeous woman.

"Say something already!" Irwin stamped his feet and fumed in frustration, drawing Kris's attention, as the twins continued their silent game.

" _Ah_ , looks like my boys found a new playmate," Tess said, smiling very cat-like. "I'd advise that your friend not indulge their mischievous ways _too_ much. They've put more than one intern in an asylum."

"Allegedly," Everight correctly swiftly.

"True, we have no documented proof," Tess said as she and the twins shared a knowing smile. "But is it not believable?"

"You have me there," Everight grumbled, scribbling something quickly on her clipboard. "Kris, these two are—"

"Dedicated to the perfect profile—" one of the twins said as he pushed Irwin aside and stepped in front of him and flourished his arms out.

His brother soon joined him. "Conjurers of color and contour—"

"We are the dreamers who make our and your dreams so," the twins said together as they danced and twirled and flourished with much grace and perfection. If their honed dancing skills wasn't enough of a sign, Everight and Tess's unsurprised faces made it clear that this was completely normal for them. "Beauty is our heart and soul and we will banish imperfections. We will stop at nothing to make you unforgettable."

Coming out of a spin, one of the twins dropped down to one knee in front of Kris, laid one hand on his heart, offered his palm to her, and said, "By my brush, you will be a bright, blinding shooting star racing across sky guiding the way to a new avant-garde standard of beauty and style."

"A snip here, a spray there," the other said as he stood behind her and fiddled with her hair, "and one look at you will fill every heart with utter devotion and fascination. Boys will fall at your feet. Girls will want to be you."

Taking his brother by the hand, the twin standing in front of Kris guided his brother around her and then the twins began another short dance. "You'll be in everyone's mind and the darling in our hearts. With us by your side, we'll see to it that your very presence is utter perfection."

The twins stood back to back.

"Emery!" He held a fan of brushes in his hand. Kris noticed he wore heart-shaped studs in his ears.

"Emsley!" The other raised a thin pair of scissors skyward. The studs in his ears were star-shaped.

"At your service!" they said in unison, each striking a finishing pose with Emsley standing and Emery dropping to the ground.

Kris didn't know how to respond and glanced over at Irwin, who had the same stunned reaction as her. In the end, she slowly and softly offered them applause.

"Don't encourage them," Everight said without a drop of amusement. "They watch way too many magical girl cartoons and eat nothing but sugar. …But I'll admit they're the best there is."

"Of course, we are," Emsley said as Emery nodded and agreed emphatically beside him. "We're the pretty soldiers of beauty and love."

"And a new star is about to be born!" Emery chimed in, arms raised over his head.

"So do we get to work some magic? Do we get to play around before tomorrow's big day?" Emsley asked as Emery pulled Kris over to one of the makeup chairs.

Kris really didn't know what to do other than go with Emery and sat down in the makeup chair. Emsley soon joined his brother and the two circled around her chair, chattered quickly, making more noise than the flock of chirping Pidgey roosting in one tree, and bounced ideas off one another as they gathered supplies. Things were going so quickly, the twins were barely a blur around her, and Kris had no idea what they were going to do to her so she watched them nervously. Noticing her uncertainty, Emery stopped and grinned at her and patted her hand reassuringly.

"Stop! We don't have time. Not right now," Everight ordered, much to the twins' disappointment and teary eyes and pouting lips. "I have a lot of things to go over with Kris before we can get to hair and makeup."

"And I still haven't settled on the outfit she'll wear," Tess said. "But I could use a pair of expert sounding boards for some fabulous brainstorming. What do you say, my boys?"

The twins' faces immediately brightened. "Can we get ice-cream?" Emsley asked, taking hold of Tess's left hand as Emery took her right.

"Yea! Yea!" Emery cheered. "With extra fudge and sprinkles and lots of candy pieces. Can we? Can we, _please_?"

Tess simply smiled, much to the twins' happiness. As they headed off, with the twins chatting rapidly to one another about what kind of ice cream and toppings they were going to get while Tess calmly walked in the middle, Kris couldn't believe that they were her prep team. Of course, the League wouldn't have them if they weren't the best at what they did but they seemed an odd match.

"You would figure they'd clash but Tess chose the twins," Everight explained, perhaps seeing the confusion on Kris's face. "She's their counterbalance. Somehow they work beautifully together and that's all I care about." She motioned Kris to follow her. "Come along now. Still so much to do."

Still not liking Everight's tone as she herded her around with Irwin in tow, Kris quickly shot her a defiant stare before looking over at Irwin and noticing him lost in deep thought. She asked him what was wrong but he didn't give her an answer. Not at first.

"Wait…" he finally said, realization coming to a head. "…They were boys?"

Kris softly laughed. At least, she wasn't the only one who wasn't sure.

-o-

Everight kept saying there was so much to do but it looked to Irwin that everything was fine and ready to go. The ceremony would be in the morning and the town was decorated and the cameras and reporters were already here or coming in early and Kris was here so what was left? Apparently, a lot if Everight was to be believed. She seemed to think Kris had to be taught how to smile, walk, talk, and even how to wave to the crowd. Kris did everything as she had been told to but nothing ever seemed to be right to Everight so she forced Kris to practice again and again, much to Kris's frustration.

After coming to Kris's defense and making one too many jokes about the pointlessness and silliness of Everight's 'preparation', the commissioner eventually kicked Irwin out of the meetinghouse. Which was why Irwin was laying down on a nearby park bench, watching the stars and idly tossed and caught a ball in the air as he waited for Everight to decide Kris had enough punish…er…preparation and let her go. Kris probably wasn't coming out anytime soon so Irwin would wait for her outside (or at least until he could sneak back inside without Everight pointing him right back out).

He was up to counting two hundred and fifty one stars when a giant shadow passed overhead and blocked the night sky from view. Irwin shot up from the bench and watched as the shadow circled around and came down to land on the main street. In the streetlights, the shadow became an Aerodactyl. A man no older than his late twenties hopped off the supposed-to-be-extinct pokemon's back. Irwin couldn't see his face well from where he was but he could definitely see his burst of red hair even from the other end of the street.

As he drew closer, Irwin finally recognized who the man was. He almost pitched over in his surprise. Why _he_ was here, Irwin didn't know. All Irwin knew was that he didn't see a point of him being here now that Kris was the Champion. He decided he would find out exactly why their old Champion was flying into Bluebell Town on the eve of the ceremony.

"You're Lance, the former Champion," Irwin said, trying to pretend to be a little star-struck, even though he actually was. He never once in his life had he expected to ever meet Johto's long-standing, legendary Champion. "What are you doing here?"

Which as Irwin heard himself speak, he realized he didn't sound like a very important man but like a starry-eyed boy meeting a very important man he had always dreamed of meeting. Definitely wasn't the impression he was going for.

Lance flashed a quick amused smirk as he fed his Aerodactyl fruit in thanks. "I'll admit you're right there. Not many people seem to know yet but word is spreading so it seems." Once it finished its snack, he recalled his Aerodactyl and secured its ball to his belt. "I'm here because I need to speak with my successor. Sorry but I cannot stay."

And then Lance headed off, cape swaying in his strong stride. It suddenly occurred to Irwin that he might not know where Kris was. And before the two sides of his brain could debate whether or not to tell him, his mouth decided to go ahead and blurt out everything.

"I know where Kris is." And Irwin could have kicked himself for _still_ sounding like a perky fanboy. Lance did kind of have that effect on most people. Of course, Kris was better than him and she was going to be a whole lot more famous and greater than him one day but Lance was still Lance.

The Dragon Master paused in his step. "You do?" Lance seemed genuinely surprised.

"Of course! I happen to be really close buddies with Kris," Irwin said, head held high and proud, and posed with his hand on his heart. "I've been by her side and rooting for her since before she whomped you and now we're traveling together and seeing Johto and Kanto anew. Just a Champion and her sidekick walkin' hand in hand…"

As if set off by something Irwin had said, Lance narrowed his eyes. "I find that hard to believe."

Well, Irwin had exaggerated the whole walking-hand-in-hand part but it was still mostly true and it pressed on a nerve that Lance didn't believe him and how quickly he had turned suspicious of him. "Why not?"

"Kris does not need a sidekick. She has her team," Lance said, his voice edged a little cool. Irwin found his calm doubly insulting, simply because he made his words sound like absolute fact rather than just his opinion. "And you seem like you'd be a bigger distraction than a partner and Kris doesn't have time for distractions."

" _Well_ …" Irwin said brusquely as he tried to stay calm but felt his face swiftly turning red. "We are friends! Ask her yourself!" He punctuated his words with a shaking raised fist.

Lance didn't seem bothered at all and remained cold and stoic throughout Irwin's heated outburst. "Lead the way," he ordered.

Maintaining his steady forceful pace, Lance followed closely behind as Irwin stomped his feet all the way to the League's meetinghouse.

 _He isn't so great,_ Irwin grumbled to himself and puffed out his cheeks in annoyance. _Thinks he's all knowing and soo cool but he's not. I'm glad Kris whomped him. We don't need a know-it-all jerk representing us, telling us we're all distractions so nyeah. …Jerk._

Kris and Everight were still in the same spot practicing how to walk and smile and whatnot. But it seemed after hundreds of tries, Kris had finally had enough. Irwin could hear her yelling long before he found her. Her glare as sharp as her frown, she stood in front of Everight with her hands bunched at her sides while the commissioner held back her irritation under a tense, stoic mask.

"But I'm doing everything just the way you showed me," Kris shouted. "You keep telling me I'm wrong."

"It's all she knows to do," Lance interceded. "No one else is ever right than Everight."

The Dragon Master's sudden arrival surprised both Everight and Kris and provided a swift break to the thunderhead brewing between them. While Everight didn't care that Lance was there, Kris acted kind of funny. She was acting shy. Kris wasn't shy. Kris was bubbly, confident, and bright but not shy. Not normally. And yet she peered up at Lance and smiled bashfully.

"Lance? When did you get here?" Kris said. Her cheeks were red in embarrassment.

"At the last moment like he typically does," Everight said, a bitter edge to her voice. "Why I ever thought the loss of your Championship would affect your punctuality, I'll never know…"

"I very well could have arrived much earlier but I thought I'd drop in the night before just for you, Commissioner. For old time's sake. " Lance smirked as he tossed the slipped side of his cape back over his shoulder.

Everight was not amused. "Yes, and you'll no doubt be proud to learn your successor shares that particular habit."

"Champions are busy people," Lance said. "Besides, it gives you something to do all day."

Red flushing her cheeks, Everight jabbed her index finger into Lance's militaristic-inspired uniform. "I'll have you know that I am up to my neck as is and that's without having to track down a missing disobedient Champion," she said. "Not that you ever appreciated what I did for you."

"I'm sure whatever that was, I couldn't have done it without you," Lance said and lightly laughed as an outraged Everight sharply turned away and stormed off.

Happy to see Everight rush off feeling just a spark of her frustration, Kris grinned. There was such a bright look of awe in her eyes as she looked at Lance. "Wow, this is such a surprise," she said cheerily. "Are you here for the ceremony too?"

"Yes, I'm here to help transition you into your new role as Champion," Lance said, his overall mood and smile lifting as the commissioner left.

Irwin didn't think she needed his help. She would do fine on her own. Kris was better than him anyway. Arms crossed over his chest, he snorted in disbelief. "How are the people of Johto and Kanto supposed to see her as the new Champion when our old one is standing right beside her?"

Lance glared at Irwin. "Do you know him?" he asked in a harsh tone as Irwin fumed.

"Yea, Irwin's my friend," Kris said. "We're traveling together."

"So you were telling the truth…" Lance didn't sound at all apologetic, or caring.

Irwin stuck his tongue out at him but the Dragon Master had already looked away. Mr. I'm-so-cool was talking to Kris and telling her not to let Everight get under her skin, basically stuff Irwin didn't think was all that important enough for Lance to swoop in and personally tell Kris about. Irwin didn't think he was really needed here and the ex-Champ could have told Kris all this over the phone or, better yet, could've holed himself up in Blackthorn City for a really long time and wrote Kris a handbook on everything and mailed it to her.

 _He doesn't_ have _to be here,_ Irwin thought, his cheeks ballooned out and his arms crossed over his chest. He stood off to the side and was pretty much ignored—Lance was definitely ignoring him while Kris was just absorbed in the Dragon Master's plentiful advice. _What do we need him for? Not like he's the Champion anymore. There's no fire, no flood, just a peaceful ceremony to celebrate the town's completion. It's not a medieval reenactment. What do we need his dragons for?_

As Irwin sulked and decided between a few classic prank plans, he heard the cheery chirps of the twins chattering in their own shorthand. They munched on chocolate cream-filled powdered doughnuts from large paper bags stuffed with more and sighed in rapture after each bite. Irwin considered asking them for one but didn't want to play their kind of head games for one doughnut—he would for a whole bag, but not for one.

"Ah, look, brother! Look at who it is!" Emsley said, catching sight of Lance, and then waved at him." Hi, Lance!"

"We didn't know you'd be here too!" Doe-eyed and smiles beaming, the twins came running to him. "Did you miss us, did you? Did you?"

Lance, trying not to be irritated, forced a twitchy smile. "Of course. How could I not?"

The twins shrieked in absolute, overwhelming joy and threw their arms around Lance.

"Do we get to make you pretty again too?" Emery asked, peering up, his cheek resting on the Dragon Master's chest.

"Oh, yes, do we? Emery and I could do it. We have lots of ideas!"

Lance laid a hand on the top of their heads and just barely ruffled their hair once in an obligatory show of warmth while fighting the urge to push and pry the overly-affectionate pretty boys off of him as they nuzzled their cheeks against him. "But you forget I'm not yours anymore. You have to take care of Kris now. She's your new Champion."

"Oh, yes, yes, of course!" Emsley said. "And she is wonderful!"

"Oh, yes, _so wonderful_ ," Emery chimed in.

"But since you are here," Emsley continued, "should we not make you pretty one last time?"

"But you can't. You're Kris's team now," Lance said, at long last freeing himself and stepping back and away. "I'm afraid I'll have to fend for myself."

"Of course, you must be very afraid!" Emery said, nodding in presumed understanding. "You never listened to your Emery and Emsley even when we were yours. How ever will you take care of yourself without us?"

"I'll find a way to manage." Lance forced another smile.

Emery and Emsley looked to one another and then suddenly grabbed a hold of one another, and with tears gushing like a fire hydrant, wailed, "He's doomed!"

Irwin, Kris, and Lance all covered their ears tightly and still their high, shrill cries slipped through and attacked their ear drums, leaving them paralyzed and doubled over in pain. When Irwin had set out to find his first Voltorb, a whole group of them had used Screech at once on him—luckily their first choice hadn't been to self-destruct. He hadn't been able to hear anything but a high ringing noise for three days after it happened but he eventually got his hearing back. The twins' cries were very similar but Irwin wasn't so sure he or any of them would get their hearing back.

"Stop! Stop! Before you make us all deaf!" Irwin shouted.

"You would cry too if you knew," Emery said through his tears. "Oh, how Emsley and I suffered, how we worried and cried—"

"And we will worry and cry more," Emsley said. "For Lancey-lamb does not listen and he will not take care of himself."

"That's up to him now!" Irwin shot back. "You don't have to worry anymore and if he doesn't take care of himself, so what? That's not your problem. You're working with Kris now. She's more important than him now!"

"That is true," Emsley said, coming to his senses quickly and drying his tears. "We are working with Missy Krissy now and we cannot let our worry distract us from making her look her best."

Emery still shook in grief and his eyes shined with heavy tears. "But Lancey-lambkin was our first and we will miss him!"

"Oh, yes, we shall miss him something terrible!" Emsley said, nodding, as he wiped away his brother's tears and smiled reassuringly at him. "But Missy Krissy is quite wonderful. She is quite lovely and pleasant. Perhaps she will listen to her Emery and Emsley better..."

Peering up into his brother's bright eyes, Emery pouted and sniffled and calmed. "Perhaps she will not make us worry and cry and do mean things like come to us with dirty, stubby nails or avoid lotion like a Charmander avoids the rain or make scary faces at us. She will be nicer to us."

"You will, of course?" the twins said, running up to Kris and taking hold of her hands. "You will be nice and listen to us and not make us cry and worry and do mean things, will you?"

Thrown off by their speed and sudden attention, full of big, pleading eyes and pouty lips, Kris smiled and shakily replied, "Of course."

The gray storm clouds parted and their tears dried up completely and there was instantly sunshine and rainbows and beaming grins from the twins.

"Oh, Missy Krissy, we're gonna make you pretty!" Emsley said chipper.

"So pretty!" Emery chimed in as the twins took Kris hand in hand over to the hair and makeup station.

Watching the tension in his shoulders fade as the Dragon Master breathed a sigh of relief and dropped his faux smile, Irwin smirked and gently elbowed him in the side. "They really liked you, didn't they?"

Pulsing veins marked Lance's forehead. "The pixies are very…loving to their favorite people. It's a good thing they bonded quickly to Kris."

"They'll never forget their Lancey-lamb," Irwin sang, still grinning, and relished way too much in prodding the Dragon Master with the twins' sickeningly-sweet pet name for him.

"They're hyper and more irritating than a cave of Zubat," Lance said, scowling, as he turned, tossed one side of his cape over his shoulder, and walked away, "but at least _they_ have their uses."

Staring at Lance as he went somewhere else (which was fine by Irwin), Irwin wasn't sure if he liked the way he had said his last words. As he thought and thought and pieces clicked together, he finally caught on to what he had actually said.

"Hey!" Irwin shouted but when he turned and glared back at him, Lance was long gone.

 _Jerk…_ Irwin grumbled as he made his way over to sit with Kris in hair and makeup. _I'm useful too. I do lots of things. He don't even know what I can do. Lancey-lamb can't do what I can do. I bet he can't juggle and do magic tricks like I can and Kris likes my magic tricks._

_Lancey-lamb doesn't even know what I know._

-o-

Swept up in the twins' tidal wave of boundless energy and perkiness, Kris found herself dropped off in a makeup chair staring at her reflection in a brightly-lit mirror as the twins once again twisted and spun around her. They chattered rapidly around her, rarely using full sentences and sometimes not even whole words and yet they still understood one another perfectly. They also randomly broke out into short, brisk dances whenever one or the other was overcome with joy and praise for an idea, no matter which brother first came up with it.

Kris sat and watched them but couldn't help but smile—their cheer was infectious and constant. She almost broke down into giggles as she imagined cool, calm, collected, and ultra-serious Lance in the makeup chair as perky and bubbly Emery and Emsley danced and bounced and giggled around him. She had almost laughed at the unpleasant, uncomfortable look on his grim face when the twins hugged him, his frown deepening further as they nuzzled their cheeks against him. She hadn't said much, mostly because she hadn't been able to without laughing.

Irwin came by not long after and sat nearby in a folding chair. There was an open makeup chair closer to Kris but the twins had already promised with a scary grin that if he sat in that chair, they would work on him too so Irwin planted himself firmly in his folding chair and watched.

After much giggling, chatting, dancing, and excited energy was burned off, the twins finally began to focus on Kris.

"It's like your hair has elbows…" Emsley said, gently pushing down on the ends of her ponytails.

"How do you make your hair point up like that, Missy Krissy?" Emery asked, peering at her hair at different angles in curiosity. "What kind of product do you use?"

"Uh…nothing. It's always done that."

Emsley removed her hair bands and the twins watched in amazement as her hair fell and lay perfectly flat. "Missy Krissy has strange hair…" Emsley said as Emery nodded in agreement. "Pretty but strange."

After a quick brush and Emsley thoroughly diagnosed Kris's hair type and its overall health, with him promising to make a shampoo and conditioner best suited to her hair, the twins began deciding what to do with Kris's hair. Their first idea was to cut it. Irwin let out a high squeak of panic, drawing the twins' attention and Kris's curiosity.

"Wha? You disagree?" Emsley said, a little taken aback while Emery simply frowned at him, his mouth like a Bulbasaur's, in disapproval.

"I-It's just…er…uh," Irwin stammered. "You said it yourself that Kris has pretty hair. Be a shame to cut it off when you could play around with it so much more. You didn't get to do that with Lance."

"And I like my hair the way it is," Kris said, idly running her fingers through her hair and staring saddened at the prospect of losing her locks. She had finally gotten her hair to a length she really liked. She hadn't had short hair since she was six when Gold cut her hair to make her look more like a boy so she could enter the boys-only treehouse too. It had been a bad idea from the start, especially when they got caught and kicked out anyway, and while Emsley would cut her hair better than Gold had, Kris didn't want her hair short again.

With much touching and fanning and running his narrow, tiny fingers through Kris's hair, Emsley considered and reconsidered while Emery nodded in agreement to every reasonable point his brother made. Kris also asked them nicely if they would keep her hair long and, giving her comforting hugs and smiles, the twins decided to leave her hair the length it was.

"What shall we do with Missy Krissy's hair then? What can we do…" Emsley said. "Pin it up high into a stylish bun so it looks like a blossoming lotus? Cascade ringlets so that it flutters like Goldeen fins when she walks?"

Kris tried to picture their ideas but nothing she imagined was probably as pretty and grand as what the twins had in their minds. When it came to styling her own hair, Kris knew ponytails and that was it.

"Ooh, so many possibilities! This is as refreshing as the breeze from a Chikorita's leaf, isn't it, brother?" Emery said beaming as he selected through lip-gloss colors at a cursory glance. "Lance was old Tauros-stuck-in-the-mud to us. He barely let us touch his hair and no matter what we did, he always came back to us with burnt, sliced, electrified, muddy, you-name-it hair… So dreadful!"

Kris wondered if they had seen Lance after they had taken down Team Rocket's base in Mahogany Town. They probably had if 'electrified' referred to any specific instance.

"And _impossible_ to style! The man trains Dragon-types, yes, but you think he would _try_ to protect his hair." And then as he fixed her part, Emsley grumbled, " …Or clean his nails once in a while."

Immediately and making Kris jump in her seat, Emery moaned, the back of his hand resting dramatically on his forehead, and leaned back as if he was about to faint. "Oh, _please_ , my dear brother, do not remind me! Haven't I suffered enough?"

Emsley rushed and caught his brother and helped him to his feet. "Forgive me, my darling Emery! I knew you were responsible for the health and well-being of his nails."

Emery shook and cried and clawed the air as he fumed, his face scrunched up in a scary mix of disgust and anger. "They were always dirty, always broken, jagged and chipped. He brought me nasty, dirty, filthy nails and I'd make them pretty and shiny and he'd muck them up again!"

"He probably did it on purpose," Irwin said.

Emery pouted and nodded in agreement.

"But it's okay now," Emsley said, wrapped his arms around his teary-eyed brother and rubbed his back, "because Missy Krissy has pretty hands and her nails are clean."

"Yes, yes," Emery nodded and returned the hug, "and Missy Krissy will be nice to her Emery…"

Kris sat still and quiet and simply watched. Much as they had loved Lance, they no doubt had fought with him too. Kris knew Lance wouldn't meticulously upkeep his appearance like the twins would want him to and the twins were very…passionate about their work. Lance's strong will and the twins' boundless passion probably made for a lot of noise and tears.

As brother consoled brother, Irwin leaned over to Kris and, shielding his hand over his mouth, murmured, "Heaven help you if you break a nail…"

Apparently, he hadn't spoken enough under his breath because Emery, his feelings still raw, had overheard him. "Bad!" he scolded, face contorted in a harsh glower. "You don't _ever_ say bad things like that!" Grabbing the extending shower spray, he pointed the nozzle at Irwin. "In the name of beauty, I will punish you!" He sprayed Irwin and the unusually high-pressured and far-reaching water knocked Irwin into a wall.

Visions of his Voltorb exploding flashing across her eyes, Kris rushed and stumbled to get out of the makeup chair quick enough. She was relieved to find him just confused and wet, mostly soaking wet.

"Irwin, are you all right?" she said, kneeling at his side and checking the back of his head for hurts. Finding one swelling bump, she gingerly searched for more. "Don't upset them," she warned quietly. "They have scissors."

"…And a spray hose," Irwin added, eyes wide in disbelief.

That was true, Kris had to agree as she made sure Irwin was all right while the twins didn't so much argue but rather talked rapidly between one another over on whether Emery should apologize. Helping a rattled and water-logged Irwin to his feet while the twins wrapped their arms around one another and cried, Kris felt less so much the Champion than a babysitter.

-o-

The next morning, Irwin felt as if a Rhyhorn had knocked him down as his shoveling combined with Emery's hosing had left his head, neck, arms, back, legs, pretty much everything but the tip of his left pinky toe aching. He laid flat on his back with his arms and legs spread out in bed and groaned if he even thought too hard about moving.

It didn't help matters when Kris's Eevee came back to the bedrooms, hopped on his bed, and sat on his sore arm. Irwin winced and sucked in a sharp breath but being a baby and not sharing his father's mean streak, Eevee didn't seem to understand that he was in pain and walked along his sore body, drawing several different kinds of cries and pained moans out of him, as he urged Irwin to get up. The little brown fuzzball probably just thought he was making funny noises.

Head turned to the side and with one of Eevee's paws mashed against his mouth, Irwin managed to say through the corner of his mouth, "Ee…vee…go to…Kris. To Kris. Go. Leave…me… Get…off…"

Eevee took his paw off Irwin's mouth but laid down on his tender neck and chest and licked his furry collar.

"Glad to know that if I'm ever in real danger, I can count on you," Irwin said wryly and stared flatly at Eevee as he cleaned in between his paws.

 _At least, it not Umbreon or Typhlosion laying on me,_ Irwin thought as he dealt with Eevee's weight sending a steady pain across his chest and neck. _Come to think of it, any of Kris's other pokemon on me would be a whole lot worse._

"There you are, you sneaky little…" Kris said as Eevee perked up, hopped off the bed, and went to her arms. "Oh, Irwin, you're not up yet? You've got time but you should get ready. …Are you all right?"

"Of course!" he said readily and scrambled out of bed. "I was just laying there 'cause Eevee looked comfy. I was totally about to get up though." He stood tall and proud and strong.

Kris still looked at him with concern in her eyes. "But your arm was awfully sore yesterday…"

"And I'm all better. Remember I'm part Steel-type," he said, grinning. "There's nothing a good rest at night and Moomoo milk in morning can't fix for me."

Her concern softened into relief. "I'm glad you're feeling better, Irwin. I'll be in hair and makeup, okay?" Peering down at Eevee as he looked up at her and wagged his tail, Kris said, "You wanna meet Emsley and Emery, Eevee? They'd _love_ to meet you."

While Irwin had to agree with that, he also thought the pixies would traumatize the puffball. It took less than a minute, even seconds, to figure out the twins could be…much to handle.

As soon as Kris was gone and far down the hall of the Pokemon Center, Irwin dropped his strong façade and hunched over in pain. Rubbing his shoulder, he hobbled over to his backpack and changed out of his nightclothes. Sure, he hurt but a good glass of Moomoo milk and the prospect of watching Kris at the ceremony soon was enough to keep him going.

And he was glad he dragged himself out of bed when he saw Kris standing by the mayor of Bluebell Town. Her prep team had decided to go with a natural look using just a touch of shadow, a bit of shine here and there to highlight her features. Her hair was drawn away from her face and left soft and flowing. A sparkly flower made of silver wire and diamonds was pinned above her right ear.

She wore a pale yellow dress the color of a ray of morning sunlight, the brightness broken up by a fancy dark blue ribbon around her waist. The dress was light and youthful but strikingly simple. She certainly didn't give off the impression that she was just the mayor's daughter. Anyone that saw her could tell she was more important than that and that she belonged up on those town hall steps with the other very important people. She looked just as she was—gentle and warm, like evening candlelight. She was a marked difference from stone-faced and ice-hearted Lance, who never looked as approachable as Kris did right now in any of his public appearances.

Irwin listened in and out of the mayor's speech and mostly just admired Kris, placed beside Lance on the League's representative side. He had to admit, childish and unpredictable as the pixies were, they were the best at what they did. After the mayor's speech and Kris cut the ribbon on the town hall doors to a barrage of camera flashes, the cameras became further seizure-inducing as the very important people posed for pictures, with the flashes and reporters going wild as (fake) smiling-for-the-cameras Lance put a hand on Kris's shoulder.

Somehow, the story of Bluebell Town's completion became less and less headline news to the wake of the reporters discovering the tantalizing news of having two Champions, one new and one old, in their midst. The last moments of the ceremony became an impromptu public interview with Lance (and sometimes Kris) taking even more pictures and answering questions. Irwin stood in the crowd with his arms crossed over his chest and scowled as another reporter asked Lance yet another question, completely overlooking Kris yet again.

… _Thinks I'm the distraction. He's the distraction. Here to help Kris, ha! He's hogging all her spotlight. This should be her time, not his. She can't even get a question. It's all 'Lance, you're soo cool. How ever will we go on without you 'cause you're so awesome even if you lost!'_ Irwin nearly yelled at the reporter when Lance was asked his opinion of 'the new Champion' but he painfully bit his tongue. _You freaking kidding me! She's right there! Her name is Kris and if you wanna know more about her, why not ask her?_

Sure, Kris looked important, was important, but Lance had been Champion for so long, it was clearly hard for the rest of the world to look away from the man they had so long upheld and admired as a hero and Champion. But at long last one reporter finally did ask Kris a question…about what she thought and felt during her battle with Lance. Irwin blew a hard snort of air in aggravation. _He lost. It's time to say goodbye to Lancey-lamb. Don't let the door hit you on your way out, jerk._

In time, the national media found nothing else of interest and dispersed and only the local news stuck around for follow-up questions with the mayor and, lo and behold, with Kris and as a double shocker, they wanted to talk about Bluebell Town and not Lance.

"Well, I had expected worse for your first public appearance but you did okay, I suppose," Everight said as they gathered in the meetinghouse after the ceremony was over. Tess helped the pixies break down the makeup and hair stations while they removed Kris's makeup and hair when the pixies weren't feeding Kris's Eevee sugar-coated strawberries.

"I guess so…" Kris offered a quick half-smile at Everight's rare compliment but it was clear she didn't agree. And neither did Irwin.

"Except no one wanted to talk to her and was all over Lance," Irwin grumbled aloud. "I guess by public appearance you literally mean Kris just showing up."

Everight's glare was as sharp as a Scyther's blade. "We've haven't had a new Champion in a very long time. Lance has standing, popularity, legacy. Kris doesn't. Bringing in a new Champion isn't a simple switcheroo game. We need the people to see he supports her."

"He's not the Champion," Irwin replied and pointed at Kris, a little occupied and keeping still as Emsley removed her false eyelashes. There was still a little moment where she looked down in embarrassment, earning a quick but mild warning from Emsley.

"And this is above your head, boy," Everight said. "Little do you know, Kris needs all the support she can get and Lance is the best she's got."

"She's got Emery—" Emery said, raising his hand in the air.

"—And Emsley," he added, pausing mid-lash removal, and raised his hand too and clasped his twin's hand. "And we'll make her pretty and cool and awesome so all the people will love her like we did with Lancey-lamb!"

"Maybe they'll love her even more," Tess said, smiling all too pleased. There was something about her voice that sounded… _slinky_ to him. "…If we play our cards right."

Irwin hung his head and whined, "Kris looked great but no one cared…"

"They noticed her, trust me. Sometimes a glance is more powerful than a stare." As Irwin met eyes with her, he felt a chill, as if a slushy snowball was melting down his neck. "Have patience. Grabbing the attention and heart of every man, woman, and child in Johto and Kanto is a subtle art. It takes time. But it will happen." Peering over her shoulder, she smiled and the twins followed suit. "…We've done it before."

Irwin could believe that and decided she and the pixies had a large hand in making Lance what he was, at least in the people's eyes. He certainly couldn't have won the world with his personality.

"Everight, I meant to ask you…" Kris said, once freed from the makeup chair, changed out of her dress, and the pixies began to pack up. "You think you could set up a charity match between me and Whitney and Morty for the benefit of Goldenrod and Ecruteak's relief fund?"

"That's actually…a really good idea," Everight said, honestly surprised before she nodded in approval. "Finally thinking like a Champion."

"Actually, Irwin came up with it."

Irwin grinned proudly.

Everight shot him a cursory once-over. "That seems…highly doubtful."

Irwin fumed but he really wasn't all that surprised.

"Well, come along, my boys," Tess said, carrying a small makeup kit with her. "We have to prepare for battle."

"To battle!" Emsley cheered with Emery joining him a moment after, each dragging a rolling kit behind them.

"All right, we're out of here in ten," Everight said into a walkie to the crew, her order repeating itself simultaneously around the meetinghouse. She then turned to Kris and said in the same demanding tone, "You're free to go but I'll be in touch so don't turn off your Gear, got that?"

Even though Kris said she wouldn't, Everight still shot her a sharp look before hurrying off, her phone to her ear.

Out of the meetinghouse, Irwin walked with Kris as they headed away from town and out into the farms. They weren't leaving yet since their backpacks remained at the Pokemon Center and Irwin wasn't really sure what they were doing—he just followed Kris and waited for her to say something. Except Kris didn't say much, except to tell Eevee to stay close by, occasionally looked around at the green meadows and pink and black Miltank grazing and napping in the warm afternoon sun but mostly she kept moving down the dirt road.

In time, they paused and rested on a length of fencing as Eevee chased a tiny white butterfly around. Kris stared idly into the neighboring pasture, her eyes much too heavy and deep in thought. Irwin removed a square of paper out of his pocket and started folding it.

"Pidgey for your thoughts?" he asked, holding up a rushed origami Pidgey, one wing was much smaller than it was supposed to but this wasn't his best folding.

Kris didn't even look. "You were right… They didn't care I was there. They wanted Lance." The look in Kris's eyes ran needles through Irwin's heart. "…And I'm not him."

That was a thought Irwin wasn't about to let Kris dwell on.

"So what? You're better," Irwin said, his voice raised, catching her attention and surprise. "You won. You're the Champ now and you're a whole lot nicer than him. You're gonna be a way better Champion than he ever was."

Looking down, Kris drew in her bottom lip. She didn't seem very convinced. Irwin softened his voice and expression.

"It's like Tess said. It'll take time," he said. "Everyone's got to kick ol' Lancey-lamb out of their heads and make room for you. They'll see how great you are soon enough. I know you're gold but not everyone's as smart as I am." He grinned.

At last, he earned a small smile out of her and Kris warmed up. "Did I really look great?"

 _Absolutely, positively, undeniably, without contest, indefinitely to the end of time yes_ , Irwin quickly thought but simply said, "Yeah!"

"Thanks," she said quietly and then looked out toward the farm. "Eevee, no!"

She hurried off the fence, hopped over the other, and ran out into the field and picked up the little puffball as he drank straight from a Miltank's teat.

 _He shouldn't have been there,_ Irwin thought, watching Kris tell her Eevee no as he wiggled in her arms and reached out for more milk. _Everight's wrong. You don't need him. You're gold._

_…Everight just has to let you shine._


End file.
